A drunk man is that last one inside a very popular bar. He passed out on the counter before he ordered a drink. The bartender is angry at a sale lost, which would have been his millionth sale before closing time on the 1000th day of business. He goes home and hangs himself.

Albert, there is a dead, FLY in your hair.

Why did Visellet stop eating cherries? Because she choked on a pit and died.

You wanna know something that's totally out of this world? The moon.

What's the difference between a mole and dynamite? - Moles don't explode... unless you fill them with dynamite.

why do you always see black people smoking? because your neighbors are black and they smoke on their porch,a place you can probably see from your house.

Did it hurt when you fell from heaven, or have you been in a wheelchair all your life?

you: Why did the chicken cross the road? them: "To get to the other side...?" you: Oh! *stare*

Why did the bald man lose his hair no not cancer obviously AIDS.

Q: Why did the kid get Christman presents in August? A: Because it was cheaper than chemotherapy.

9/11/2001

What do you call a black man on the moon? An astronaut.

Man I'm Bored Nice to meet you.

what did Sandra bullock say to Jesse James? I hate your fickin a**!!:)

what do you call 10 mexicans standing in a line? It's probably a lunch line for a taco vendor. And even this is just a coincidence. Everybody loves tacos.

Do u know what would be a big pain in the ass? A thorn

Three construction workers are sitting on a beam high in the air, getting ready to eat their lunch. "Hey!" someone shouts. "Get down from there! That's a safety violation!" So they do, and instead they eat their lunch on the ground.

why did tom get HIV? He was raped by a giant scorpion

What happened to the guy who ate the alarm clock at 6 o'clock in the morning? He died

Why did the jewish family move? Their house burnt down. They lost everything and was tragic

Chuck Norris was once engaged by a woman for whom he had to fight a man to obtain all while doing a mundane activity in an unorthodox manner. He promptly declined for he is married and told the man he only fights for self-defense. He proceeded to put his pants on one leg at a time like everybody else.

why couldn't max ride his bike? because max is a goldfish.

Last Christmas I gave you my heart but the very next day your body rejected the transfer and you died.

Knock Knock. The doors unlocked you can come in. The two men have a nice conversation while enjoying a couple of beers and then order a pizza because they get hungry.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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