Why did the chicken help people across the road all day? Because after past experiences the chicken decided to become a lollypop chicken and help people not make the mistakes he did

why did the white man walk into the bar? He was thirsty

Why did the old man miss the Alzheimer's Day walk? Because he died in his sleep.

Why did the young boy lose a testicle? Because he was viciously raped by a large parrot

Whats better than winning a gold medal in the special olympics? Not being retarded

If one train is heading North at 60 mph, na danother train is heading South at 45 mph, how many waffles are on the roof? The answer is purple, because aliens like coffee.

you know whats worse than cantaloupe? no cantaloupe

A priest enters a bar moments after a young teen walks into the same bar. The priest scolds the teen, warning him of the possibility of arrest, alcoholism, and other bad life consquences. The teen apologizes to the bartender, and much later in life, he thanks the priest.

Q: What do you call a man with no arms and no legs hanging on a wall? A: Art.

Q: What kind of punch do vampires drink ? A: None... It's really blood, you should know that by now.

I saw a butterfly yesterday with no wings so I poured some red bull on it and BAM! it drowned.

What do you call a racist guy surrounded by a gang of black pepole? Dead.

what is black and white and red all over.....a nun being murdered

Roses are Red. Violets are blue. I took a shit on your wife's face last night.

How big is Justin Bieber's penis? 10 inches, and its in his ass, and its actually Usher's penis

Whats worse than burning jews? jews that are alive

An irishman walks into a bar and drinks 6 pints of guiness. He then drives himself home and savagely beats his wife and children.

A man walked into a bar. He sat down, had a nice meal and went home relatively satisfied.

Three Jews get on a train to Stockholm. How many get off at Stockholm. None. The train went straight to Auschwitz.

A: Why is that boy on the ground? B: He fell. A: Why did he fall? B: He tripped. A: Why did he trip? B: I tripped him. A: Why did you... B: BECAUSE I WANTED TO!

Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, That's what they tell me because I'm blind.

The doctor told a man he had aids. He told his friends he had AIDS so his friends wouldn't sleep with his wife after he died.

what do you get when you give a man viagra? A man with an erect penis. Viagra is known to increase blood flow and vascularization in the penis, allowing for erections for people with erectile dysfunction.

How many dogs does it take to screw in a lightbulb? None. Dogs don't have thumbs.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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