Why did the koahla fall out of the tree? It died.

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A man walks into a bar. Several hours later he staggers out and drives into an oncoming school bus, killing all occupants. He survives to live with the grief for the rest of his life and attempts to commit suicide several times.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? A: WHERE'S MY TRACTOR?!

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Roses are red, violets are blue. Cassidy's a whore so open the door.

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A black man and a white man were both pulled over for street racing. They both were also found to be drunk driving. Only the black man was arrested. It turns out the black man had just massacred an entire Amish village before going street racing to celebrate.

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A man walks into a zoo. There is only one animal, a dog. It's a shitzu.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. Bend Over.

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Thumbs up if you're reading this in 2015!

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how many letters are in Montana? 7 yes

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Why didn't the man stop at the stop sign? He was violently killed turning at the last intersection

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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"Knock knock!" "Who's there?" "A door to door salesman. Are you unsatisfied with the way your dish soap handles your plates? Then I have the product for you!" "I'm not interested in your product, but thank you anyway." "No problem. On an off note, how did you hear me? I didn't speak very loudly when I said knock knock, and I didn't even bother to knock on the door or ring the doorbell." "I have really good hearing." "Oh, okay. And for future reference, maybe you should open the door when talking to a visitor. Then body language gets established and the conversation flows more nicely that way." "That's some good advice, and I'll take it. Thanks, salesman." "You're welcome. On to the next house."

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Land Rovers

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You can lead a horse to water, but you can't put it in a basket.

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the NAACP

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whats straight as a fudge packer kyle grund

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what happened when the sports mascot ate a bean and cheese burrito? he shat inside his costume and got fired.

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Why was the boy sad? Because his dog was brutally murdered and the man responsible painted his bedroom walls in the dogs blood.

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A White guy invites his Black friends into his house, he says "Make yourself at home." THEY DO

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Knock Knock Who's there? Hitler... Time to go to Aushcwitz

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Why did the dog lick his balls? Because he can.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it felt like it.

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Your mom is so ugly that she had self-esteem problems and severe depression as a teenager due to merciless bullying due to her looks, however she overcame this, found a man who loved her for who she was, and then married him. She now lives a happy life.

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How many women does it take to ski across the pit of lava? None, they would burn and die.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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