What do you call two mexicans playing basketball? Friends

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What happened after Peter broke his toe? He went into cardiac arrest and died.

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It is the conjoining of the two possible outcomes of the interstellar and post modern possibilities of the pasta sex god's niece's favorite colour after she falls off her bike whilst riding down a yellow slide after her twenty-seventh birthday when the two suns form a triangle in the night sky over the delta. Yes indeed that was good pudding.

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Q. Why did the chicken cross the road? A. To get to the other side.

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What do you call a black person playing basketball? An athlete.

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Two computers walk into a bar I forget the rest

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What does a tree and a human have in common? They both fall if you chop them with an axe.

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Hey I just met you. And this is crazy. So get in my van. Cause I have candy.

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What do potatoes wear to bed? Potatoes don't sleep and don't wear clothes.

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What do you get when you cross a dog and a chicken An animal cruelty charge

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Q. How many grains of rice can you fit in an egg? A. Fire extinguisher.

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Why do birds suddenly appear? If you were more observant, you would notice they usually approach gradually.

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Why didn't the chicken cross the road... Because he got hurt last week while crossing the road.

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A dyslexic Irishman walks out of a bra.

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Whats worse than a dead baby? 6 million dead Jews.

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You know your in Houston when... The highway sign says so.

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Why did the 10-year-old boy get on the computer? He had to finish a project for Social Studies, and it was due the next day.

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An rich man walks into a ghetto and buys something for 1 million dollars. what store was he in? he wasn't in a store,he got robbed

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Why did the chicken cross the road??? Suicide.

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Q: Who followed E.T.A Hoffman? A: ASAP Rocky. (ETA and ASAP are both time-based abbreviations, ETA meaning 'estimated time of arrival' and ASAP meaning 'as soon as possible'. Thus, ASAP can form a response to a requested ETA. Additional humour comes from the dissonant occupations of the two individuals: E.T.A Hoffman being a nineteenth century gothic author, and ASAP Rocky being a modern rapper.)

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A man is talking nonsense at a wall when another man walks up to him. "Why are you talking at a wall?" "I'm trying to appease the mighty wall god Kaleothayrhonka." "Cool, let me join you!" And they both talk at the wall for hours on end because they are stupid that way.

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How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

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A man walks into a doctor's office and says "Doctor, it hurts when I poke my leg like this!" The doctor replies "That because there's a knife in your hand."

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Two black guys and a Latino were walking down the street. One of the black guys says to the Latino, "You have some lint on your suit." The Latino brushes it off and says, "Thank you. I have an important meeting with the board of trustees this afternoon, and it would have been embarrassing if I had lint on my suit."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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