person 1:hello person 2:hello person 1:do you want to hear a joke ? person 2:yes person 1:good bye person 2:good bye

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Roses are red, ill give you a wink, two in the pink, and one in the stink.

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A Hispanic, Jew and black man walk into a bar. The bartender tells them to get out because he's closed.

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Three blokes walk into a pub. One of them is a little bit stupid, and the whole scene unfolds with a tedious inevitability.

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Why was there a lion in the bathroom? Because I threw a refrigerator at it and stapled a frog to its butthole, all while it was being chased by a 10 foot scorpion and a purple salmon that only had 1 eye.

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A deaf man sits down puts on his headphones presses play on his ipod starts to nod his head and realises what he has just done

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Why did the car go down the road? Someone was driving it. Why did the car stop? Because he suddenly fell and had a stroke.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? I've lost my tractor!

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why couldnt sally help timmy pick up his ice cream? she had no arms

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Why was 6 afraid of seven? well if 7 8 9 then what happened to the rest?

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Whats worse than the Holocaust? Anal

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You Obviously Lack Originiality YOLO.

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What do you call a black man on a bicycle? A cyclist.

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What is translucent and smells like a carrot ? A translucent carrot.

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So a guy walks into a bar. It hurt really bad. He was pissed, so he went home and took his seal to a club.

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In the time it has taken you to read this, a small African child has died.

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Q: What's Black and White and Red All Over? A: This is a logical fallacy. If something is "Red All Over," it is implied that no other color can be showing. Thus, whatever innate Black and/or Whiteness was formerly attributed to said object will now have been inherently obfuscated by its Redness.

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Lynching Lynching is an extrajudicial execution carried out by a mob, often by hanging, but also by burning at the stake or shooting, in order to punish an alleged transgressor, or to intimidate, control, or otherwise manipulate a population of people. It is related to other means of social control that arise in communities, such as charivari, riding the rail, and tarring and feathering. Lynchings have been more frequent in times of social and economic tension, and have often been the means used by the politically dominant population to oppress social challengers. Violence in the United States against African Americans, especially in the South, rose in the aftermath of the Civil War, after slavery had been abolished and recently freed black men were given the right to vote. Violence rose even more at the end of the century, after southern white Democrats regained their political power in the South in the 1870s. States passed new constitutions or legislation which effectively disfranchised most blacks and many poor whites, established segregation of public facilities by race, and separated blacks from common public life and facilities. Nearly 3,500 African Americans were lynched in the United States between 1882 and 1968, mostly from 1882 to 1920. Lynching during the 19th century in the United States, Britain and colonies, coincided with a period of violence which denied people participation in white-dominated society on the basis of race or gender after the Emancipation Act of 1833. Today lynching is a felony in all states of the United States, defined by some codes of law as "Any act of violence inflicted by a mob upon the body of another person which results in the death of the person," with a 'mob' being defined as "the assemblage of two or more persons, without color or authority of law, for the premeditated purpose and with the premeditated intent of committing an act of violence upon the person of another." Lynching in the second degree is defined as "Any act of violence inflicted by a mob upon the body of another person and from which death does not result." To sustain a conviction for lynching, at least some evidence of premeditation must be produced, but "The common intent to do violence" may be formed before or during the assemblage."

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what do you call a nun in a wheel chair? Virgin Mobile By: jb lshs

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Does it not sound kinda fun to keep slapping someone that always turns the other cheek?

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Q: Knock knock Q: Who's there? A: Not Suzie

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Why do all black people look the same? They don't, you're either just racist or unobservant.

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What does Obama, the President of the United States of America see when he closes his eyes? His eyelids

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Why is the sky blue? the game

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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