What do you do if life gives you lemons? Whoa... where did these lemons come from?

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Knock knock Who's there? Banana? Knock knock Who's there? Banana Knock knock Who's there? Orange Orange who? Orange you glad you don't have cancer?

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What did the boy say to the stranger at his door? He said, "i'm not supposed to talk to strangers" and closed the door.

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Why did the cat fall out of the tree? Cause the branch broke. Why did the baby fall out of the tree?Cause it was stapled to the cat.

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Why didn't the busy San Francisco business man hear his alarm clock ring this morning? A nuclear bomb blast occurred 700 meters from his front door. The estimated blast radius was approximately 100 square miles. Naturally, his alarm clock didn't make it.

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Whats better than finding a hot girl in your room? nothing

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Jamie: Peter your hands smell like cows! Jason: eeh no they smell like cows balls

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Whats the difference between the Taliban and a Football Team? I'm not on the football team.

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A blonde, brunette and redhead are stuck on an island that is a mile away from any civilisation.The blonde decides to swim to find help. The blonde swims half a mile, has a rest and then carries on swimming.

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Why is 6 afraid of 7? 7 is a terrorist.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He looked both ways and saw there was no traffic.

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What is the worst party ever? Nazi.

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Yo mama so stupid she tried to drown a dog and was quite successful at it. Know she serves a death sentence.

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Ask me if I'm a tree. Are you a tree? No.

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What really killed the dinosaurs? ME!!!

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Your mumma's so ugly. Period.

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What's the difference between a black man and a park bench? The bench can support a family of 4?

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How do you eat a sandwich With yo mouth bi tch

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No one walks into a bar. It is closed.

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Q: Why did the bully hit the kid A:Because he is a bully-I thought that would have been self explanitory.

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Your mother is so slutty that she seduced me while I was drunk. I'm so sorry.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says "what'll it be?" The horse, unable to understand human language. Takes a shit and walks out.

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Roses are grey, Violets are grey, I'm color blind.

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Why did the toast land butter side down. The devil visited earth that day and therefore everything that could go wrong did.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops