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But there's a sound Dumbledore knows... What does the Fawkes say?

Why did the chicken cross the road? His wife and children had just been struck by a moving vehicle traveling at approximately 45 miles per hour trying to cross the same road. He ran across the road to comfort his dying wife and two children as they took their final breaths. The chicken was also not really a chicken but a middle-aged man who had recently been laid off his job and diagnosed wiuth an incureable disease.

What did the boy with no arms or legs get for Christmas? A scholarship to a prestigious college that he did not deserve.

Why did the turtle cross the road? Because there was a chicken stapled to his face.

What do an elephant and a plum have in common? They're both purple, except for the elephant.

a potato flew around my room

How do you make a little girl cry? Throw a brick at her face.

what is green and has weels? grass i was kidding about the weels.

Once upon a time, in a magical kingdom, there were too many similar jokes on anti-joke.com. One man thought he could be funny by writing a joke that referenced this, and be even funnier by referencing what he was referencing. Then he referenced that, then that, and so on until the layers of meta caused his brain to explode. Some of it landed in your mother's vagina.

Why was the gorilla crying? His brother died

A bus full of orphans falls off a cliff.

Why did Sally fall off the swing? - Because she had no arms. Why couldn't she get back up again? - Because she had no legs. Why didn't anyone help her? - Because she had no friends. Knock knock. -Who's there? Not Sally.

What's funny? Nick Sotelo

Whats funnier than a black man? A black president

Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 is a registered sex offender.

Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. :D

A cat walks into a bar and orders a bowl of milk. Well, okay, it doesn't actually order it. It more of meows in a begging fashion and the bartender, being a kind individual, gets the lost animal a bowl of milk. But who's to argue semantics?

Did you here about the 2 guys who wanted to go to Paris? They didnt go!

why did the black man fall down the stairs? he was blind, do to loss of vision from cancer

What has sand and an ocean? A picture of a beach.

Your mamas so old that she sat next to Jesus in kindergarten?

Where was Sally when the bomb exploded? Everywhere.

What's the difference between Tiger Woods and Santa? Tiger woods is a famous golf player and Santa is a fictional old man dressed in red and white who is said to live in Lapland, have an airborne sleigh driven by eight magical reindeer and come down the chimney to fill childrens' stockings on Christmas eve.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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