Why did Prius driver go to jail? Because he ran over someone and then fled the scene of the crime (at 11 mph)

what did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? wheres my tractor

when life throws you lemons you should probably get out of the way because it will hurt

whats orange and sounds like a parrot? A carrot

Why did the chicken cross the road .... The traffic light turned red

friends are like snowflakes. if you piss on them they go away

What's worse than a dead baby joke? A dead baby.

What do you call a deer with no eyes? No eye deer

Why do women fake orgasms? Because they want to give men the impression that they have climaxed.

Swiggity Swooty. I'm currently in pursuit for that part of your body people refer to as "booty".

"Ask me if I'm a tree!" "Are you a tree?" "No."

Roses are red, Bacon is brown, this poem makes no sence, BACON!!

The graduate with a Science degree asks, "Why does it work?" The graduate with an Engineering degree asks, "How does it work?" The graduate with an Accounting degree asks, "How much will it cost?" The graduate with a Liberal Arts degree asks, "Do you want fries with that?"

Whats the difference between wayne rooney and shrek? Well, one, shrek is fictional. Two if he was fictional,he is green. Wayne rooney is not green. Three wayne rooney plays for a football team, surely shrek has no idea what football is. The list goes on.

why did the boring girl get ditched she was boring...

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The Holocaust.

Chicken penis.

The MLS

What is bad at catch The twin towers

A man with Tourettes walks into his Daughter's kindergarten classroom. Fortunately, he was able to control himself and refrain from any outbursts of profanity during the visit.

why did the grandpa drop his big mak??? Because an army tank hit him

roses are red violets are blue i have 5 fingers the middle ones for you.

What did the abortion clinic serve at the cafeteria? Fetus soup

What do you call a black man with gold teeth? Crunchie

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...