How many dogs does it take to change a light bulb? None, any dog aware of the situation would kindly inform its owner.

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Why did Steve refuse to have sex with a black guy? Because Steve is heterosexual.

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Why did the boy drop his ice cream? Because the mas of the ice-cream gathered up enough potential energy to increase the velocity of said ice cream making a mess on the ground.

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Anybody else hate when people mispell words in jokes It ruins the joke Most them prob some scumbags Probs to Jeffrey K April 12, 2013 1:55 PM

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Q: How did the blind girl on the tight rope die? A: She fell because she has Parkinsons

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Why did the doctor have no peins? She was a woman.

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some dude: weed is bad Other dude: then why do they prescribe it to people are you dumb or are you stupid

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How many midgets can you fit into a telephone booth? Well, it really depends on a lot of factors. The size and design of the phone booth itself is pretty important. Also, midgets really have a wide range of sizes, but we could do some analysis and find out the average at least. Based on that we could have an estimate done soon.

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why didn't the donkey go to the party? Because, unfortunately he did not have the required linguistic skills to communicate with the person inviting. This is obviously dependent on whether the person who invited him was a human, if it was another donkey then perhaps this would of happened. However, this is also very unlikely as donkeys do not have parties or really communicate

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Keira Knightley walked in to a coffee shop. The man behind the counter said "Wow, you're Keira Knightley!". Keira replied, "No, actually I am just one of your many masturbatory fantasies. You are currently staring at an old lady that just asked you for a latte". "Oh, by the way. You are drooling and have an erection."

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Why did the little girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

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What do the Jewish man, the Black man, and Mexican man all have in common? They all miraculously like cantalope.

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Whats Brown and Sticky A) a stick

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How do Chinese people get their names? From their parents.

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A plane carrying an Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman is destined to crash unless some weight is lost. First they drop the spare engine, but there is still too much weight. Then they drop the luggage, but still there is too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

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this is gay

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There's my tractor.

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What did the fish say when it swam into the concrete wall? Nothing. Fish cannot speak

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Why couldn't Mary see the painting? Because she had no face.

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Why didn't the 13 year old Black boy have any friends? He was autistic and didn't connect properly with people.

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A horse walks into a bar and the bartender says, "How'd you open the door?"

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What do you a a toilet with fecal matter in it? A toilet.

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What do you calk a dirty mexican? a hard working gardener

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Why did the man have 3 girlfriends? A: because he is a womanizer

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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