Why couldn't the guy find his pants? Because his girlfriend stole them last night

thumb_up thumb_down +12

So, these two antennas were getting married. The wedding was great, but the reception was terrible!

thumb_up thumb_down -21

despite popular opinion to the contrary you shouldn't eat mercury.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

What do you get if you cross a Kangaroo and a Sheep? They are too entirely different species and cannot be crossbred.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

What's black and white and red all over? A chess board; I lied about the "red all over" part.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Tall asians

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Dieing in a hole.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

How do you keep a woman from driving your car? Shoot her.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Both my milk chocolate and my white chocolate are brown. Why? I crapped on my white chocolate.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What do you do when you find a black man rolling around on the ground? Stop laughing and reload.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Knock knock! Who's there? Wristwatch! Wristwatch who? Orange ya glad I didn't say banana

thumb_up thumb_down +8

I am thinking of a number between 1 and 100 what is it There are many numbers between 1 and 100 so it is highly unlikely that I will guess the right number

thumb_up thumb_down +5

A white man walks into an elementary school. He was the teacher.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Knock knock. Who's there? Big Brother. Big Brother who? That's right. ALL are who, Akbar!

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Yo momma's so fat she weighs more than the average woman of her age and height

thumb_up thumb_down +6

How did the three girls get free drinks? Two of them were attractive and out of obligation to "the game" the third girl was also purchased a beverage.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

How many jews does it take to change a light bulb? None, you don't have to be jewish to change a light bulb

thumb_up thumb_down +14

MILLERS FUNNY LIKE A JEW

thumb_up thumb_down -4

How many black teachers does it take to figure out 10 x 30. only one shes a very respected teacher

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What do you call a tall midget? Well tall is a relative term so a midget may be considered tall compared to something or someone shorter. Say if a midget was compared to a baby he/she would be considered tall, considering the baby's small height. However midgets are looked at short by most people who are taller than them because of their physical problem that they can do nothing about.

thumb_up thumb_down

Rebbeca black walked into a bar on Saturday

thumb_up thumb_down +33

What did Osama bin Laden say to Jesus? Nothing. He's in hell.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

How can you spot a blind person at a nudist colony? They might be carrying a white stick, or have a guide dog or someone to help them navigate the premises.

thumb_up thumb_down

Yo mama is so skinny, when she sits around the house, she sits comfortably in every chair. - Stephen Colbert

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops