How do you make a plumber cry? Kill all his friends and family.

A 36 year old Canadian woman.

What did the cow say to the other cow? How should i know? Go ask them.

How do you make a boy cry? Kill his family

A: Why did the chicken cross the road? B: Why? A: To get to your house. A: Knock-knock B: Whose there? A: The chicken!

A rabi and a priest go out for a coffee they talk for a while and go on there way

What's brown, no one likes and has had a bad history? Dog poop

what do u call a newspaper boy on brake? your uncle because hes broke and struggling with income.

Boy: Hey girl if I had hand-cuffs, I’d lock myself to you right now! Girl: I would find that extremely creepy.

Q: Why are black people so tall? A: Not all black people are tall, and if they are it is probably from their specific genes.

kathryn atkins

Q: What do you call a car full of black people? A: Stolen

Why did the blonde go to law school? She was sick of people assuming that she was not an intelligent woman due to negative sterotypes about her gender and hair color and set out to prove said people wrong.

Don't wake me up. If you wake me up then I will give you a puppy. Just wait until you fall in love with the puppy, because then i will kill it in front of you.

Wait, I am sleepy as the world which spawned you Nero, but which comment is mine again?

You know what turns me on ....? TABLES!! You know what turns me on even more...? TABLES WITH CHAIRS!!!

What did the parakeet say to the grapefruit? Nothing. Parakeets can't speak.

What did the disabled child say when I hit him with my car? *thunk*

Have you ever seen the inside of Stevie Wonder's house? Neither has he.

What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Cancer.

Why'd Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock! Knock! Who's there? Not Sally.

I have 13 hedge hogs in one hand and 4 pineapples in my van how many pikelets does it take to cover the roof. Purple because aliens dont wear hats.

How u know when ur sister have periods... Fathers dig taste like blood

What's red and puts out fires? A fire truck? Oh, you've heard this joke before.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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