Why did the Muslim suicide bomber commit suicide? He was nervous and didn't think he could hijack a plane.

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Kindness is like peeing in your pants, Everyone can see the results, but only You can feel the warmth

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Why couldn't the boy see the pirate movie? He was blind.

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So my wife was in the kitchen, and I asked her to make me a sandwich. She agreed. I then volunteered to make her one. Lesbian relationships are amazing.

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? Cue annoying little kids saying WHAT!!!!!!!!! A: To check out all the chicks

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Why did Jack like oranges? - Penis

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How do you know a French guy has been in your back yard? Your thrash cans are empty and your dog's pregnant

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What is big and white and will kill you if it falls from a tree? I don't know. I cant think f anything big and white that fall from trees that can kill you and besides if it is big enough to kill you then you will likely see it and avoid the section of that tree lest the big white object should fall and kill you because of this it is likely that anything that is big and white and falls from trees will in result kill you.

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Q: What is the likely outcome of anyone who watches 'WWE'? A: They will lose their virginity to a hooker.

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why did the chicken cross the road? well he usually takes the bus to his job but he missed it so he had to walk. Unrelated to this, he works at KFC

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A man walks in a bar he talks to the bartender aand he tells him a joke about him and hs friends. how do you find out his name? You killl the bartenders friends and family untill he talks.

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what did the egg say to the boiling water? itll take a while to get hard cause i just got laid by a chick.

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I am a schizophrenic, so am I.

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Why was the chair sad? It wasn't, for chairs do not posses the proper attributes to feel emotions such as depression.

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A dog walks into a bar, the bartender asks, "why the long face?" The dog replies, "because I am a dog you idiot, my face always looks like this"

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What did the blonde waitress say to the man with a curly moustache? Good evening, are you ready to order?; yes [x2]; and what would you like with it?; certanly; there you go; no, I'm sorry; right.

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So I took this girl into my room we got in bed, We got under the covers and.... We had a rather delightful game of scrabble.

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I have sexdaily. I mean dyslexic. Fcuk!

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How did the guy drown if he wasn't in water? A shark threw up on him

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Once upon a time there was an ugly barnacle. He was so ugly, everyone died. The end.

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Why did the chicken cr-VAGINA!!!!!!!!!!! sorry, tourettes.

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why wouldn't the boy shake his teachers hand? his abusive father cut it off with an axe when he was a child

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Why did the cat cross the road? He thought he would make it to the other side, but instead was hit by a mini van and soon after died in the bushes from internal bleeding.

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Why do Squirrels accidentally plant millions of trees. Because they they bury their nuts and forget where they are.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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