What do you call a black guy flying a helicopter? A pilot.

roses are red violets are blue you're an orphan, had to break the news...sorry little fella.

Q:How many pieces of paper can one tree make? A:Trees cannot make paper, people make paper from trees. So the answer is none, a tree can't make any paper whatsoever.

Why did the blonde do at the WTC on 9/11? Die.

im gunna build a lego house what shud i make it out of

How do you treat someone that is feels like a total failure? Treatment: Okay, draw a square on the board over there, but in order to succeed, you must fail at it. Patient one: Oh, I drew a cicrle :( Patient two: I drew a square :( Congratulations one you succeeded at failing! Now get outta here. Congratulations patient two, you succeeded at the given task, bye bye.

Man is even more eager to copulate than a donkey – his purse is what restrains him

Why does it take more than one blond to replace a light bulb? Because one had no arms, thus requiring the help of another person. It just so happened that that other person was a blond.

why didn't love legs cross the road because he had no balls

Why did Zayne have no friends? Because he is retarded.

YO MAMA SO SHORT she should really consider wearing long tunic-like blouses, prints that contain vertical stripes, and heeled shoes with a pointed toe in order to create the illusion of length to her silhouette. That having been said, society's limited definition of beauty is quite inadequate for the diverse and progressive world in which we live.

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead

What salad was served in the salad bar on the Titanic? Probably a selection of green leaves, radishes, cucumber, sliced hard boiled egg and cherry tomatoes, topped with cress, mixed seeds and a delicate dressing.

Jokes are dumb. Stories are better. Did you ever hear the story of the blind man who walked into the fish market and said, "Evenin' ladies!"?

What did the chair say to the guy? Nothing, as it is a chair and chairs can't talk

Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

Not Steve Jobs

How do you kill a retard? Give him a knife and say "who's special?"

How do you paint a wall red? Throw a baby at it.

What's the best sound in the world? Children screaming

Roses are red Violets are blue I want to have sex But no one else wants to

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I've got Alzheimer's, Who are you?

What do you call a man with a knife in his back? An ambulance

do yo know what's funnier than getting on a hidden camera show? Nope! it's just chuck testa

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...