What did they do with the drunken sailor? Gave him the sack, which meant he could no longer provide for his family.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have a knife Take off your clothes

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

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The Blonde walked into a wall.

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How do two blondes stay alive at the bottom of a pool for 30 minutes? They don't and they died

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what does michael jackson do to little boys? nothing, he's dead.

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What's the difference between anti jokes and Charlie Sheen? Nothing. Their both stupid

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A man violently rapes a small child. Unfortunately the child has aids and gives them to the man.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? She is a woman.

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What's silent but deadly? Limnic Eruption.

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What did the alcoholic tell his son? Don't do meth.

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A woman is about to buy a house and is faced with a difficult decision. She must choose which house she'll buy the next day. During the night she thinks about it and the next morning she has made a rational decision. What house did she choose ? TRICK QUESTION - Women can't make rational decisions.

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Fine, start by proving to me that you can be a reasonable human being, and I will meet you myself, I have too many of those that rely on my guidance and protection in order for me to send myself off to some suicide mission. Say, are you familiar with the Antony Stark method?

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What is Brown And Sticky ? ......... a Stick

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he wanted to.

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What do you do when your archenemy walks up to you? Kill them due to their vulnerability, I mean they walked up to you...

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How do you confuse a blonde? I guess the same way you confuse someone of any other hair color.

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What is green, has four legs, and if it falls out of a tree and onto your head, it will kill you? A pool table.

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Whats better than giving birth to a disabled son? A Blowjob

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Watch he thinks he can out wit me watch adams next joke it will suck sooooo bad

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If Justin Bieber and Rebecca Black had a baby, would it be a boy or a girl? It's a fifty-fifty shot.

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Why did Suzie fall off the swings? Because she didn't have arms or legs. Knock, Knock. Who's there? Not Suzie

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A man walks into a bar. "Ouch, he says, I did not see that bar there."

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Hey I just met you, and this is crazy, but here's a free drink, you'll wake up in my basement.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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