What did Adam Sandler get for Christmas? Nothing, he is Jewish

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what d you call three arabs walking through the desert? dehydrated.

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What did the judge say to the midget when he sent him to jail ? Stop beating your wife

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What do the Irish do on their birthdays? Eat birthday cake and sing happy birthday

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What did George Washington say before he crossed the Delaware? "Get in the boat."

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Why did the little boy cross the road? He didnt. He actually got halfway across the road and was struck by a fast moving car. There is now a memorial on the side of the road mourning his death...

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a blind person walks into a deaf person and the deaf person says "dadadader"

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Whats the difference between a prostitute and crack dealer? One sells addicting drugs, while the other exploits her vagina for money. Either way, they're both illegal.

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How do you say cabbage in Spanish? You don't.

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why wouldn't the boy shake his teachers hand? his abusive father cut it off with an axe when he was a child

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Wigan.

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knock knock who's there Alec Baldwin I just raped your children ..........

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What's brown and sticky? Caramel.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The cognitive capacity of the chicken is significantly underdeveloped in comparison to humans; thus, comprehending a chicken's motives is impossible. Furthermore, interspecies communication is largely understudied - a mysterious division of science that may never be fully revealed. Therefore, one could safely theorize that no single human could breach this gap in communication differences (assuming chickens do, in fact, communicate) and in turn, could not understand the chicken's reasoning behind its choice to cross the road (excluding the possibility of psychic connections between chickens and humans [see 'Dog Whisperer' for a more clear explanation on interspecial psychic relations]) That being said, the only scientific and logical way one could understand the aforementioned question is through observation. For example, perhaps food was located on the other side of the road. However, this seems to pose a plethora of other questions: Why was the chicken near a road and not in a coop stocked with adequate food? Was this a wild chicken? Are there wild chickens? Do wild chickens often cross roads? Are wild chickens dangerous? If so, why hasn't there been warnings about dangerous, wild chickens crossing roads? The answer to these questions may never be discovered or explained.

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Q. want to hear the biggest lie in the world ? A. sure A.I have read and agree to the Terms of Service - View Terms of Service

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what ya call e dong withb eyes peeneyes

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Why was the blonde fired from the factory? Repeated absences and violation of company policy.

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Q: Why was Sally crying? A: Because someone punched her in the face

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What did the doctor tell his patient? Unfortunately you have cancer.

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An atheist walks into a church

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"Imagine a World Without Free Knowledge" -I'm not imagining, thanks Wikipedia!

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Just think...there are 7 billion people in the world...so that's 14 billion orgasms!

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Q. what sucks A. getting robbed loosing your family and then you die by cancer

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There are two muffins in the oven. One muffin says to the other "phew it's kinda hot in here" the other muffin says "AWW a talking muffin!"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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