Patient: Hey doc, I think I might have a tumor... Doc: Don't worry, it's all in your head.

What do birds need when they are sick? Most wild animals die when they are sick. However, they can sometimes be nursed back to health with special food and electrolyte solutions in special animal rehabilitation centres.

Would I ever lie to you? No, because lying is bad.

how do you wake up a cat? you break it.

An Ethiopian fell into an alligator infested river. He ate 7 of them before he got out.

I just wrote three jokes on antijoke.com ... nope, make that four.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Who cares?

What did the poor family eat for thanksgiving? Food

What's worse than a dead baby in a trash can A hundred dead babies in a trash can Whats worse than a hundred dead babies in a trash can A live one at the bottom Whats worse than that It eats it way out Whats worse than that It brings friends

why is thus joke stupid? because it is! deal with it!

Why did the Jew post a free link on his Facebook wall? Because it is funny and he hoped his friends would like it.

What is worse than ending and apple joke in the holocaust? Getting raped by a goat

Once soon a time there was a boy named steven. He dropped his ice cream because... You know the rest

if your having girl problems i feel bad for you son, i don't have any.

Knock knock. Who's there? The Grim Reaper. The Grim Reaper who? Joking with me will not postpone your death.

Roses are Red, Violets are Red, Everything is Red, Retinal Hemorrhage.

In particle-joke physics, the antijoke is the extension of the concept of the antiparticle to the joke, where the antijoke is composed of antiparticles in the same way that the normal joke is composed of particles. Furthermore, mixing jokes and antijokes can lead to the annihilation of both, in the same way that mixing antiparticles and particles does.The result of antijoke meeting jokes is an explosion.[1]

Why was little timmy crying? He walk in on his dad molesting a minor.

What's black, green, and doesn't have to take a shower? I have no idea.

A baby seal walks into a club. He is immediately escorted out because babies are not allowed in clubs.

What's worse than eating half a worm? Eating somebody's brain.

A black man walks into an all white bar. He was escorted out, ten months later he died of a heart attack

guess what? chicken butt.

Chuck Norris walks into a bar, the bartender says ouch.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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