A man walks into a bar, and is brutally slaughtered by eight drunk customers.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

A man decides to go hunting in the woods with a shotgun, he is going through the woods and a bear randomly pops out of no where, knocks him down and rapes him. So the next day he came back with an even bigger shotgun and said, "i am going to kill this bear" so he goes through the woods, the bear comes out of nowhere, knocks him down and rapes him again. So he comes back the next day with and even bigger shotgun and says, " i am going to kill this bear, skin it, and eat it" so hes going through the woods and out comes the bear, knocks him down, gets real close to his face and says, "you dont come out here for the hunting do ya".

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Knock Knock No one's home Okay, I'll come back later.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

ok... let me think of something good! Write Your Own It's easy to take part, just type your text below! ok... let me think of something good! Write Your Own It's easy to take part, just type your text below! ok lets... wait.. wtf I have read and agree to the Terms of Service - View Terms of Service

thumb_up thumb_down -19

What's blue and can't sing? Blue.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Burp

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Q: How do you fit 30 Jews in one car? A: Two in the front, two in the back, and the rest in the ash tray.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

How many pairings of animals did Moses collect before the rain started? 1. 500 2. 50000 3. 500000000 4. Nobody really knows 5. It was Noah... Moral: Lol.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What did the prizon cell mate get for christmas. Herpes!

thumb_up thumb_down -8

0000000010000000000000001000000000000000000000011111111000000000111111000000000000000000011111000000000000011100000000000000000000000000000000100000000000000000000000000000000000000001000000000000000000000000000000000000000011100000000000000000000000000000000000000111100000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000001111111111111111100000000000000000000000001000000000000001000000000000000000000000001000000000000100000000000000000000000000001111111111111000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000 SMILE

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why is this website called anti joke.com? Because it has anti jokes.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

KNOCK KNOCK! Who's there? KNOCK KNOCK! Umm... Who's there? KNOCK KNOCK! OMG I SWEAR TO GOD WHO THE HECK IS THERE?!?!? KNOCK KNOCK! *opens door* Oh.... It was a woodpecker...

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What did the bartender say to the black guy? hi there

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why did Suzy drop her ice cream? Because she got hit by a bus. Knock Knock. Who's there? Not Suzy!

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Women's rights

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Knock knock Who's there? Amy winehouse Amy winehouse who? Amy winehouse died by falling down a flight of stairs.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

I said no! Its not funny... Maybe a little but stop it, I am having trouble enough finding out which comments are mine as it is.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

How did the thief acquire a lamborghini? He has a side job as a lamborghini salesman.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

A neutron walked into a bar and asked "how much for a drink?" The bartender did not reply because a neutron is so small he didn't notice that it even entered.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

How old is Batman? Old enough to be a bat.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why was the black man hired at the clothing store? He needed some money to feed his family.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

so there are 3 people who have heard of this magical cliff; theyre names are harry, dick, and joe. how the cliff works is that when you jump off you turn into whatever you say as you jump. first harry jumps off and yells plane, he turns into a plane and flys off. next dick jumps off and yells bird he turns into a bird and flys off. finally joe steps up to the cliff as he was walking he trips and falls as hes falling he yells HARRY DICK he than hits the ground and dies. everyone mourned for such a well respected individual.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Want to hear a joke? Womens rights.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

What's worst than finding two worms in your apple? Two holocausts.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops