Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven kind of looked like an alligator.

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why does it take 2 woman with p.m.t to change a light bulb? because there both tired , feel bloated , and could do with a bar of choccy

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How do you make a mother at the playground cry? You steal her 3 year old daughter

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What's big, red, and eats rocks? A big, red, rock eater.

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What did the farmer say when he finally found his tractor? "Wheres my tractor?" Oh ya he had alzheimers.

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YO MAMA SO SHORT she should really consider wearing long tunic-like blouses, prints that contain vertical stripes, and heeled shoes with a pointed toe in order to create the illusion of length to her silhouette. That having been said, society's limited definition of beauty is quite inadequate for the diverse world in which we live.

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A van drives into a car. An hour earlier, the man who was driving the van walked into a bar.

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Simon walks into a bar. He orders his favorite beer. The bartender says "Hey Simon, I see you're back with the usual, aye?" Simon says "Touch you tongue to your elbow." The bartender couldn't do it.

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Whats worse than a blonde jumping off a bridge, smashing into the metal roof of a large car, and orphaning two little girls who are beat in the orphanage and become homeless and unimportant and consequently jumping off bridges themselves?

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? One is a human being belonging to a particular religious minority and the other is a delicious Italian food favoured by English speaking western cultures. The problem with this anti-joke is that the facts are not correct, pizza was originally invented and China; however,it looked quite different then what might be considered pizza by our standards, when pizza was brought to Italy it was improved to make what we now consider pizza in modern times. While some people may consider pizza an Italian food, this would be failing to give credit to the Chinese who invented it.

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Why couldn't the tractor start? The farmer lost the keys.

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guess what happened to ur mom? my mom is ded... oh...

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Q. What's the difference between Michael Jackson and a plastic bag? A. One is white, plastic and dangerous to young children, the other is a plastic bag.

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How many black men does it take to change a light bulb? TO GET TO THE OTHER SIDE!

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How do you tell when your dog is dead? I don't know. I never had a dog and my parents beat me.

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What did the Jewish man say to the banana? Nothing, because he has common sense

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An old jew, an irish man, and a young mexican woman in her mid 20's are on an island. They eventually become hungry to a extremely ravishing extent. The jew cries out: "I can't take the thought of consuming man, because I am only allowed to consume kosher" The Mexican says: "Alright" The Irishman says: "O.K. Until then lets head over to Timilio's... I hear they are a fine establishment and also serve Kosher meals."

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When life gives you lemons, you must also have a proportionally sufficient amount of both water and sugar in order to make lemonade.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have schizophrenia And so do I..

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I like my wine like I like my women. Not at all.

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how did santa ruin christmas? he didnt put presents under familys tree's

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Three men walk into a bar. They order drinks. This joke isn't funny.

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Your mama's so fat, she can't even find clothes that fit her well.

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wow such mark very mark many mark so mark

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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