A man climbs a tree, falls, and breaks his legs. He will never walk again

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Two gay men in a hottub. They relaxed for about half an hour before getting out and going to the bed, where they fell asleep.

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I raped someone in my basement... ...Just Kidding!... ...I dont have a basement

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Your mom is so old so will die soon.

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What's the difference between a watermelon and a car? A lot.

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The dog buried it's bone. The next day it unburied it, and chewed on it until it was wrecked.

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Why did the monkey follow the tree? Because it was dead.

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What's the difference between blacks and whites? The skin color

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What's slower than mollasses? Your fattass mother!

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Why was the little girl screaming? She was on fire. ~G TY

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Why did the little girl fall off the swing? Her father beat her

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What happens to a fish with no fin on the right side? It repeatedly swims in a circle.

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Fine then, its me Tifa, I am sorry for going against your ideology, I was trying to emulate and copy you, but yeah... Bad thing is that yeah I taught these concepts to a real shitload of people Nero, on the bright side, its not much compared to what you know. Sorry for being all rude, but thirty something? I mean I never seen your face nor even the color of your skin Mr Doctor Doom, but you always struck me as very, very old. I kinda appreciate you calling me the girl with the big red scared eyes, most people call me you know, most people never look me in the eyes, not that I really blame them.

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Why didn't the lactose intolerant man get a drink at the bar? He was the designated driver.

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2 black kids walk into school

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What did the homeless man say to bill gates? Nothing he was about to die.

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A ghost walks into a bar. Nobody sees it because it is a supernatural entity.

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-hey sam look what mom gave me for christmas -what eli? -a new baseball bat -thats your prosthetic leg silly

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Two men walk into a bar. You would have thought that the second one would have seen it.

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How can you tell if a duck is behind you? Turn around

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what do you call a black guy who flies planes? a pilot

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why wont chin ever take his hat off because his head will be cold

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If a blonde and a feather were dropped off of a building at the same time, which would hit the ground first? A feather is a light object and would most likely float all the way down at a slow velocity, the blonde is most likely 100+ pounds and would die because she is stupid.

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Yo mamma's so fat she attracts other matter with a force proportional to the product of their masses divided by the square of the distance.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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