Whats the difference between a horse and a snake? A snake is poisons, a horse is not.

What did the guy who had cancer get for Christmas? Death.

That's what he said.

An incoming freshman introduces himself to his Ethics professor by saying, "What's up?" To which the professor responds, "You should never end a sentence with a preposition." The freshman, who is both clever and witty, quickly responds to his future Professor, saying: "Professor, I practice linguistic description, such that I observe language objectively in a way that does not adhere strictly to grammatical and syntactic dogma". The professor, surprised by the student's philosophical disposition, engages the student in a highly constructive dialogue about the philosophy of language, from which both the student and teacher learn more about each other and themselves.

why did the boy drop his icecream? Because he got hit by a boat

What is x (4 - 10) + 6879 (333) x 678912345 - 9.87537 when x equals pi? Answer: YOUR FACE!!!

Robin, get in the Bat-mobile!

what do you call a grown man driving a plane you dont it isnt possible to drive a plane

Q. If you're paddling up river and you lose three tires, how many pancakes does it take to cover a doghouse? A. Purple because ice cream has no bones.

A man walks into a bar. His alcoholism is destroying his family.

What did the boy and girl do at the wedding? 69:)

Knock Knock. Who's there? Your worst nightmare!! Ohh.... Do come in it's raining outside.

Two muffins are in the oven, one looks at the other and says, "it sure is hot in here." The other responds, "AAhHH a TALKING MUFFIN."

What's the difference between an old man and a child? The old man is older than the child

Knock, knock. Who's there? No one. You have no friends.

A Quadriplegic walked into a bar,

A midget walks into a bar. No one cares.

You mamma's so fat that even Dora can't explore her!

"Doctor do i have aids?" asked the worried 13-year old.

What did the tree say to the plant. Nothing tree's cant talk.

why did the girl fall off the swing? she had no arms.

I like my coffee like i like my woman, Without a penis.

What did Madeline McCann get for Christmas? Nothing she's dead.

What's a pirate's favorite letter of the alphabet? Aye, ye be thinkin' it to be "ARRRR" - but it be the C

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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