DON'T expect the unexpected, you don't want to KILL the unexpected ;-)

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Ask me if I'm a tree. Are you a tree? No.

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What do you call a homosexual in the army? A brave and honorable person who should be applauded for their service to this great nation

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Persond A: A guy blows himself and his family up with a hand grenade Person B: HEY!!! Thats not funny thats how my family died

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What's worse than a dead baby? A baby.

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How did the dead baby cross the road? stapled to the chickens foot.

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why was the witch in the broom factory? she was recently employed there and is loving her job maing brooms

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Female Athletics

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If an illegal immigrant fought a child molester, is it Alien vs. Predator?

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If life gives you lemons, You throw them as hard as you can at the nearest stranger. If life gives you melons, You're probably dyslexic.

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A man adopts an orphan. He waits till the child is a teenager to tell the news. He then commits suicide as to scar the child emotionally for the rest of its life.

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Q: What did osama bin laden say to the worker behind the gas station counter? A: May I buy this bag of chips?

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What is white and black and red all over.

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Why does six love nine? They both get pleasured

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Why did the boy not eat his ice cream? He was addicted to self afflicting. The blood from one of his newer slashes oozed out on the cone which being wafer slowly got soggy. At this point the ice cream slid out of the cone as it was soggy and as he went to eat it, he found an abssence of ice cream. After this unprecedented occurance he gave up with his self harming, so all was good.

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What did the boy and the dog do at the park? Nothing, the dogs dead

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A horse walks into a bar, prompting the show-jumping judges to subtract points for failing to clear the obstacle.

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Interviewer: Are you currently a smoker? Applicant: Are you implying that I look like a chimney?

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Knock Knock? Whos there? The police, please open the door.

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What do you get when you have 10 kids in a church? A lot of rape cases.

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What's the difference between a duck, an engineer, and a leaf? There are many differences between these 3 that I will not list them all.

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What did the boy with no arms and legs get for christmas?? - Cancer

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Why wasn't the black man served at the bar? Because they didn't serve his kind there... Did I say black guy? I meant to say a horse, wait, did I say bar? I meant the barn, yes, a horse walks into a barn but they couldn't serve him because he wasn't tamed

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What do u call old black people in a shed? antique farm equiptment

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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