So a Jew is walking on the street and he sees a penny, and he decides to pick it up because ever since the fire that killed his family and burned his house down he has been living on the street and he needs all the help he can get.

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What do you call a black man speeding away in a Ferrari. A wealthy man who is late for work.

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A policeman asks a suspect in a murder investigigation about his alibi. The suspect gives him a solid alibi. The suspect go's home to his wife and have dinner.

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knock knock who's there? nobody. then why are you knocking?

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Why was the boy sad? Because his dog was brutally murdered and the man responsible painted his bedroom walls in the dogs blood.

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Whats the difference between a woman and a fridge? A fridge doesn't fart when you take your meat out!

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whats long, hairy, and has one eye? my cat fluffy, he has cancer.

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What sound does a childs head make in a vice? I don't know, I was too busy wanking.

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Roses are red, violets are red, everything's red... Retinal haemorrhage.

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Yo momma so fat, she's in the hospital dying of morbid obesity. Sorry man.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? When he first entered the world, Chicken was a lonely bird. Nobody else liked him. Not even his mother. He was small and scrawny, and whenever the farmer came to feed the pigs or shear the sheep, he would get scared and hide in between two pieces of wood. One day Chicken woke up and his family was gone. Although they had never loved him, his heart was tender, and he was desperately concerned for him. After hours of searching for them, he overheard Cow speaking to Horse: "It's a tragedy, really. They were such a happy family. But now their off to the land of KFC, forever lost in the sea of chicken wings. But Chicken was determined to change his family's fate. He escaped the barn and ran into the woods. There he traveled day by day, and at night he hid from the hungry wolves. Life in the forest was tough, but no tougher than the loss of loved ones, so he kept going. On and on and on, until the forest ended and the city began. It was a new world to Chicken. He had never seen so many different buildings and contraptions. His eyes had never before held the wonder of the majesty of such a strange place. After traveling through the dangerous alleys of the city, he finally found it: the terrible land of KFC. The place where humans' dreams begin, but chickens' end. The place of horror and death and unfairness. The place that summarized Chicken's whole life. He was here now. The only thing separating him from his family was a road. A road that was so small compared to his previous trials, so incomprehensibly tiny when placed Nextel to the gaping hole in his broken heart. So the chicken crossed the road. Then he got hit by a bus.

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Why did the boy cry when he got a new puppy? Because he had anal seepage coming out his ass

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the awkward moment when a fat person says they are fat

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What's the difference between a black man and a park bench? Sitting on a black man is just plain rude.

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whats dead and gone your nanas cat

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Knock knock. Who's there? Frank. Frank who? Cut the shit, I'm being chased by a tiger!

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What's the difference between a battered woman and a regular woman. There is absolutely no difference...

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What stars with C, is hairy on the outside, moist on the inside and ends with T and has UN in the middle? Coconut

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Q: Whats worse than 5,000,000 African Americans being killed? A: 1 White person being killed

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A midget walks into a bar. No one cares.

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Q. How do you make a chicken dance? A. I don't know I was asking you.

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What do you call a dog with no legs? It doesn't matter because he won't come anyways.

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What do Wal-Mart and Michael Jackson have in common? They both have made a lot of money and are also well known around the world.

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Knock Knock Who's there? F F who? F you.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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