Knock knock Who's there Police

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What's a bench painted red white and blue all over? An American BENCH.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

If i have a remote that can switch people to mute, the number 1 people will be asian, and it will be on the train.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Roses are red violets are blue Timmy what are doing with that gun?! Bang....

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Whats the difference between peanut butter and jam? I can't peanut butter my dick into someones ass

thumb_up thumb_down +18

What do you get when you mix monster, coke, and and seltzer? Kicked out of stop and shop.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

How come fat people drive cars? It takes to long to ride a bike to McDonalds

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Q: What do you call a guy with no arms and no legs? A: Russell

thumb_up thumb_down -28

Yamum is so poor that she has trouble supporting herself and paying her own bills. Subsiqeunetly she had her electricity and home phone cut off, not that she would have any use for a home phone with her electricity cut off anyway. She sits on her bed and cries herself to sleep each night and has been thrown into depression due to her spiraling financial debts of which she can see no end to. This has led to several attempts to take her own life to hopefully finally find a way out of her misery and debt.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

A black man logs on to facebook. He checks his news feed then logs off

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What do you call cheese that isn't yours? Probably cheese, since there really isn't a possesive form of the noun.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Guess what my nephew said yesterday? oh wait, i forgot hes dead..

thumb_up thumb_down -42

What's the difference between 50 dead babies and a three-course meal? One of them can feed me for a day and the other is a three-course meal.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What is yellow and bright? The sun.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

what ate all the ants in the hill? an anteater

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Q: What was the name of the armless elf in Snow White? A: Stumpy

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Why do elephant tusks stick out? For uprooting trees and bushes, and for defending their young.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Whats Pink and fluffy? Yellow fluff thats been dyed pink :D

thumb_up thumb_down +16

A man walks into a bar and says to the bartender "Hey, 2 beers please" The bartender asks why he is ordering two, as he is alone. The man replies "There is a taxi waiting for me outside."

thumb_up thumb_down -28

Two cannibals are eating a clown one turns to the other and asks "does this taste funny to you?" The other cannibal says " yeah because the clown has been dead for weeks."

thumb_up thumb_down -25

An Asian with a big dick.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

How do you turn a piece of meat into a vegetable Break her neck

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Knock Knock. Shut up.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Once upon a time, I was a Muslim.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops