Why did George Bush blow up the Twin Towers on 9/11? 9/12 was his girlfriends birthday.

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Q:What happens to an elephant if he falls from a building with 10 floors? A:He dies

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When writing haikus Sometimes, I miscount the syllables See, that line has eight.

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Why did Stephen Hawking ask for pizza? Because he was hungry.

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What do you call a blind, crippled, child? Unlucky.

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There are two blonds in a car, the driver to looks to the other blond (carelessly taking in her surroundings) They crash and the passenger is grusomely killed to the point of not being recognized and the driver later commits suicide from the guilt and pending law suit.

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A man was walking along and got his legs shot off. He then proceeded to calm his wife and children and buy a wheelchair.

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If life gives you lemons, you are probably suffering from hallucinations.

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two black guys are in a car. Whose driving? The question is too broad. Either one of those men or unmentioned people could be driving the car.

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Good for him. Thats wonderful!

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Friend: "yo momma is so fat........ Me: My mom is dead

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A jellyfish walks into a bar, the bar doesnt appreciate him, so he retreats back to his jellyfish lands.

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Knock, knock Who's there? You're adopted...

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What's worse then spilling milk? Instantaneous Human Combustion

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did you hear about the guy who got his left leg and left arm cut off? he's all right now

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A man is in a bar with a drink A lorry driver comes into the bar and gulps down the guys drink and the guy starts crying the lorry driver says "dont cry ill buy you another" thee guy sas "it's not that today i woke up late for work and when i got there i got fired and then when i went to go home feeling depressed my car doesnt startand so i walk home and i find my wife in bed with the gardener and so i came here to die but you drank my poison"

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why did the man throw his clock out of he window? he was mentally insane.

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Question 1 - What is 1 + 1 = Hospital

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How are friends and trees alike? They fall down when you hit them with an ax.

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A blonde is walking down the road, and she sees a sign saying STOP. She carries on walking. As a pedestrian, the sign does not apply to her.

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I enjoy telling anticlimactic jokes Very much.

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Read a Book.

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What goes in your mouth long and hard, and comes out soft and sticky? A stick of bubblegum.

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Why do British Folk have yellow teeth? Genetics. Although scientists don't know the exact cause, it has been shown that people of British ancestory have a genetic predisposition which inhibits the body's breakdown and utilization of Vitamin C and Calcium. This causes decalcification and scorbutic gums. The British slang term "Limey" comes from the fact that the British Royal Navy was made to drink lime juice to prevent scury. The Royal Navy was almost wiped out by an epidemic of Scurvy.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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