Why is there a corpse in this TV box? Bob was never a great skydiver.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Why did the kid cross the road? To show his friends that he had guts. And man, did he have guts.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

When the mom got home from work, she was very tired. Her 6 year old son asked her nicely to make him a PB&J sandwich. She said sure and made one. Her son was very pleased and ate all of it. He knew he had a great mom. I actually lied above. The mom was killed by three men in hoodies in her back yard. They came inside and also murdered to boy. Worst of all the killers stole all of her food including the rasberries the boy was looking forward to eat. I guess it doesn't matter now since he is unable to eat anymore...

thumb_up thumb_down +7

A man ordered tomato and basil, but received tomato with a man. the man's name is Basil!

thumb_up thumb_down -85

What's red and smells like blue paint? red paint

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What's the difference between a duck? I'm sorry, I was typing too quickly and missed off the end of my sentence. I meant to say "What's the difference between a duck and a goose?" and the answer is that they are entirely different species of waterfowl.

thumb_up thumb_down +50

A man walks into a bakery and buys a doughnut. He then starts to drive home when he realised that he'd forgoten to eat the doughtnut and has to returne to do so.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

How many babies does it take to paint a wall? It depends on how hard you throw them.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

What happens when you divide by 0? Sadly, you don't.

thumb_up thumb_down

A man found a magic lamp. He rubbed it and a genie emerged from the lamp. The genie asked what his new master's wishes were. The man wished for asthma.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

There's a black man and a mexican in a car who's driving ? The black man because the mexican is intoxicated and they both want to prevent serious injury or death

thumb_up thumb_down -19

what's brown and sticky? A stick

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What did one tree say to the other tree? Nothing, trees can't talk.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

An irish man walks out of a bar

thumb_up thumb_down -10

If life throws you cars, you are probably on LSD.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why did Sarah fall off the swing? She didn't have any arms Knock, Knock. Who's there? Not Sarah...

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Knock Knock! Who's there? Steven. Steven who? Steven your neighbor, may I please come in?

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Knock Knock Come in!

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Why did a homeless man eat another man's face off? Because he was hungry.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Last week, I saw a film. As I recall it was a horror film.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The holocaust Whats worse than the holocaust? getting raped by a giant scorpion What's worse than getting raped by a giant scorpion? getting raped by your seventh grade math teacher, Mr. Smith What's worse than getting raped by your seventh grade math teacher Mr. Smith? Snapping your femur bone in half What's worse than snapping your femur bone in half? Birthing a dead baby

thumb_up thumb_down -19

what do you call four black people in a red sleeping bag? -a very snug sleeping bag as they can rarely fit more then one person comfortably

thumb_up thumb_down +38

Two gays walk into a bar, they are then kicked out by the homophobic owner.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

an ant walks into my aunt.... the ant took a dump

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops