Why was the man happy to see his wife dead? He beat her

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What's the worst part about anti jokes? They get boring after a while

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what did the blind kid boy get for Christmas? he doesn't know because his parents are mute.

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What did the Woman say to the man after he walked into the pole? That was a pole you idiot

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What did the baby get for his 1st birthday? Nothing, he was a Harlequin baby, therefore dying during the last stages of pregnancy.

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Why did the monkey fall off? It had no more lives. Why did the second monkey fall off? I dunno. Why did the third monkey fall off? Since the second was unknown, the third does not exist. Why did the little girl died? It's pretty obvious.

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Whats less comfortable than a metal bench? The trunk of a car when you're being abducted.

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>>-------------[Knee]---------->>>

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in 2001 a man was working happily in his office cubicle and got an email from his boss saying that he had great news for him. filled with excitment he knew he was getting A big promotion and could finally afford that new toy his kid has always wanted. Feeling great the man walks up to the office window to enjoy the view he notices a very large commercial airliner flying straight towards his office.

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a man walks into a bar and says "help me, my daughter just got hit by a car! the bartender phones the ambulance and the girl survives.

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Two men are walking down the street. They both don't make eye contact and continue walking.

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Connor is such a dope, he doesn't even know Betty White jokes aren't funny.

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How do you make a baby fit in a bottle? Blender.

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Man who wrote "The Hokey Pokey" died. Hard part was getting him into the coffin. They put his left leg in and then the trouble started..

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What would kill a Muslim if they were to ingest it? Arsenic

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What did the murderer do after killing the family? he went to jail.

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Me: Knock Knock, Pornstar: Cum in.

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What is blue and rolls ? A blue, rolling thing.

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Warning: Are you 16 and curious and stuff? DO NOT SNIFF YOUR SISTERS HEAVILY PERFUMED PANTIES! Because you know hormones, and then 18 years later she uses the same perfume and... Yeeah.. ITS HORMONES! DON'T PRETEND YOU NEVER SMELLED A PUSS... Well, nevermind guys, I believe you :)) PS: By DO NOT, I mean DO! I mean just make sure you dont get your mothers panties, your sister is gonna be like "Omg you are such a perv you and your dick always up my face!" Then you can go all like "yeeeaah you wish!" Moms panties? Seriously man, that is just sick! You need to get some self respect!

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Paddy and mick were walking down the street when they saw some traffic lights. They proceeded to cross the road and continue on their journey.

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What's the difference between difference and between? One is different and the other between.

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Why couldn't the blonde read the road map? Because she was blindfolded and tied up in the trunk.

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What did the guy say to the blonde? "You're a blonde."

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what happened to the 4 year old girl who got stuck in the freezer? She froze.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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