An under aged girl walks into a bar. She couldn't have done so without a fake ID and early development.

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When does 1+1=3? When the condom fails.

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What's black and red all over? Half a cat

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A: what does hellen keller say to her mom? B: nothing. she cant speak due to her lack of hearing and visualizing

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Why did the black man buy a watermelon? So he can eat it.

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Penis.

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Why did the horse stop running? His master beat him to death.

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What do you call putting a toad in the microwave? Animal cruelty.

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A man walks to his coathanger and shouts: "I AM GOING TO THE STORE!" his wife says not to because the Rapist 'Eggman' was out again. He says he will be careful. On his way to the store, he hears "They are the Eggmen, I am the Eggen-" but the man shouts "AND I'M THE WALRUS, SO SHUT UP AND GET OUTTA MY FACE OR I'LL KOO-KOO KOO-JOOB YOU AND YOUR CHILDREN!" Rapist and the singer became friends and found two more from Liverpool who were excellent musicians. They formed the band 'The Beatles'. The Eggman shot the Walrus in 1980 after the band's breakup.

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Why did the little kid fall off the rollercoaster? His dad threw him off.

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What is a vampire's favourite dessert? Vampires aren't real.

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I told my friend the best anti joke I've ever heard in my life the other day. He didn't laugh. He is autistic and doesn't understand humor.

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I went to the zoo the other day, there was only one animal there and it was a dog. It was a shitzoo

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 commited statutory rape on a younger 5, gang banged 8 with 10 and 11, murdered 9, and was sentenced to jail for life.... eventually the case was dropped and 7 was let out early for community service. He told 6 he was coming for him 6 months later.... 6 was so terrified he didn't know what to do... he was living in fear... eventually he commited suicide by jumping off a cliff just off the coach of Palm Beach into the pacific ocean. His body was never found His family didnt get to say good bye... This is why 6 was afraid of 7

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What do you get when you cross a Mexican with an octopus? Nothing, two different species cannot propagate and gene splicing isn't advanced enough to separate the specific traits of an organism.

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roses are red, violets are blue, I have schizophrenia, which is a serious mental disorder in which I have difficulty properly experiencing reality. It should not be confused with multiple personality disorder, which is a completely different disease with different symptoms.

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Who is buried in Grant's Tomb? DeShawn

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what did the african say after he got beat by the cops? wow i really shouldn't have sliced that mans head off.

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What's worse than stubbing your toe? Nothing. Stubbing your toe hurts like hell.

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:D STORY TIME! :D ... :D So once upon a time there was a... :) Uhm... :\ I forgot... Sorry :(

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The only hand that can beat a royal flush is Chuck Norris's hand

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Why did the waiter put rubber bands in the soup? Because he wasn't a very good waiter.

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Q: What happens if you pee on a rock and scraches it on a tree? A: The tree gets wet

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Whats worst than the holocaust? What? 6million Jews.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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