So this guy is waiting for a heart transplant. He dies.

How did the conductor survive the Electric Chair? - He was a bad conducter

Kenny died. The Bastards.

A: My dog has no nose! B: How does he smell? A: He cannot smell, because he has no nose.

Roses are red Violets are blue I want to have sex But no one else wants to

A young boy walks into a bar and asks for directions or a map. The bartender takes him into a backroom and gives him a map he just happened to have. The boy continues on his way and the bartender is happy that he did a good deed.

how do you stop a gang of black people from raping a white woman? throw a basketball

Roses are gray violets are gray everything is gray because I'm color blind.

Whats worse than the Holocaust. A worm in your apple.

Mr. Krabs lives in bikini bottom (pinch pinch)

Two friends are arguing over who is the best pie maker. '' I've made pumpkin, apple, peach, cherry, blueberry, and sweet potato!" " Yeah well I've made all of those AND pecan!'' ''Yeah well have you ever made boysenberry pie?!" "No! What the hell!" *in a calm tone* " Yeah, me neither."

Q: Did you hear that Hollywood actress got stabbed last night? A: Really? Which one? Q: Reese.. um wither.. withersomething A: Witherspoon? Q: Yes. Her. She's in a critical condition.

A sign at the drug rehab centre said keep off the grass. Jimmy thought it was a joke. So the groundskeeper chopped his legs off.

Knock Knock It's the police, im afraid your wife has been killed in a horrible car accident.

What's big, black, juicy, large, and succulent? A gourmet meatball.

Why did the blind man get hit by a bus? Because his seeing-eye dog was distracted by a squirrel and ran off, leaving the man in the middle of the cross-walk in heavy traffic.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

why did the little boy drop his ice cream cone? because he was hit by the planes that hit twin towers

I can't remember the punchline for this joke so I recommend you stop reading this...why are you still reading this whats wrong with you!!!!

What did the salad say to the dressing? Nothing! Carrots don't talk!

Why was Rosa Parks forced to sit on the back of the bus? All the other seats were taken....

how do you scare a deaf person? you yawn

Why did Jimmy fall off the swing? He had no arms. Knock-knock Who's there? Not Jimmy

How do you make a clown stop smiling? hit him with an axe

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...