Why did the disabled man fall of the swing, someone shot him.

Why did it take Da Vinci so long to paint the Sistine Chapel? Because it was painted by Michelangelo.

What's tastier than a dead baby? An orphaned dead baby.

Why are you going to thumbs this joke up? Because I use the words "Chuck Norris" Thus making it impossible to not thumbs up.

All the kids at school we're playing soccer on a sunny day except Jenny, because she had a headache and didn't come to school that day

why couldn't the black man get a job? Because he was a violent sociopath with a criminal record.

Snape dies. ^ Spoiler Alert tarelona major

Son: i like gaming Mom: you are wasting your life *son jumps in trash can

Why was the little girl crying. Her dad wiped his bloody penis with her teddybear.

Why did the baby cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken.

What happened to the homeless guy when a woman gave him five dollars? He shot the woman because he is mentally retarded.

Did you know Helen Keller had a dog? You did?! Oh . . .

How many babies can you fit on a ferris wheel? None, babies aren't allowed to ride

how do you upset an obese cat? you put her in dog sweaters

What is worst then 9/11? What? Tiger woods

When life gives you: High Fructose Corn Syrup,Citric Acid, Ascorbic Acid,Maltodextrin, Sodium Acid Phosphate, Magnesium Oxide, Calcium Fumarate, Yellow 5, Tocopherol, and less than 2% natural flavours... Make lemonade.

What's big, black and hard to swallow? A bowling ball.

What ryhmes with turtle rape

What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To try and beat the oncoming car.

Knock Knock. Who's there? ...(No answer)

John and Marry wanted an abortion. God just laughed And Jesus was born Merry Christmas everyone!

Yo Momma is Like a Prostitute... ...I pay her for sexual intecourse

But there's a sound Dumbledore knows... What does the Fawkes say?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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