Where do you live? In a house

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Why was john's balls itchy? Because he recently gained a severe infestation of pubic lice.

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What did the fat man order at McDonalds? Nothing, he was on a diet

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Knock Knock. Whose there? The IRS. All your base are belong to us.

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What's the difference between an American and a Russian? One's American and one's Russian.

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How many black guys does it take to change a light bulb? One.

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Wanna hear a joke? Fifa price ranges.....:(

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Roeses are purple violets are green WTF u just stabbed me.

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Q: Why couldn' the muslim eat pork? A: Because he had been raped and killed by a giant scorpion.

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1. Look at the size of his putter. 2. Oh, dang, my shaft's all bent. 3. You really wacked the hell out of that sucker. 4. After 18 holes I can barely walk. 5. My hands are so sweaty I can't get a good grip. 6. Lift your head and spread your legs. 7. You have a nice stroke, but your follow through leaves a lot to be desired. 8. Just turn your back and drop it. 9. Hold up. I've got to wash my balls. 10. Damn, I missed the hole again.

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Q: What does Chinese look like? A:Chinese

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Why didn't Jesus like Pizza? Because Pizza doesn't exist.

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Some people devote their to talking in their head. Jesus christ.

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three people walked into a bar and there was a blackman,a jew,a white man and a nazi bartendor which ones did he shoot? The black and the jew and the white man

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Jew logic fail: Jew: We have endured suffering for thousands of years! Guy: And how old are you again? Jew: eight. Moral: If you see a goddamn moral in this one then post it yourself :P

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Why did the man buy his wife expensive flowers? It was their anniversary and he is a faithful husband.

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Q: What did the nomad get for christmas? A: Most likely nothing because he lives in the middle of nowhere where no stores exist. If anything, he got a sandstorm.

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knock knock who's there? your destiny

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when life gives you lemons, force a hobo to eat them because lemonade is going to suck if life doesnt give you any sugar.

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What's sad about an elderly couple who has had a long, fruitful marriage? Nothing.

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what did spiderman say before he saved mary jane? ill save you mary jane.

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Knock Knock? Why did you just say knock knock just ring the doorbell

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Roses are red Violets are blue In Soviet Russia They had communism

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"Hey baby, did it hurt when you fell from up there?" "Waaaaaaahhhhh..." "Ok, let me kiss it better."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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