Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Because he was forced, along with thousands of his poultry counterparts, on a march to meet their imminent death at a mass slaughterhouse. Upon being beheaded and processed, the meaty corpse was delivered to a local grocery store and cooked into a wholesome family dinner.

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A black, asian, and white guy jump off a building, who lands first? Well, according to newton's law of gravitation every massive particle in the universe attracts every other massive particle with a force that is directly proportional to the product of their masses and inversely proportional to the square of the distance between them. It depends on who weighs the most

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Have you ever seen the movie called "The Tourist"? No

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What Happened to the man who married a money? He contracted HIV

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what do you call a black man on crack? a crackhead.

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Chuck Norris can speak Japanese. Believe it or not he is actually multilingual, he speaks Spanish and French as well.

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chickens, roads, horses, bars,roses, violets, sally, knock, knock, fnord

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roses are red violets are blue i have five fingers the middle ones for you

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Two Iranian men walk into a bar and order a Coke and a Lemonade. The Barman said take a seat and he'll bring them over.

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Three Blondes were walking when they come upon some tracks. The first blonde says they're deer tracks. The second blonde says they're elk tracks. The last blonde says they're moose tracks. While they are all arguing about what type of tracks they are, they get hit by a train.

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Why couldn't the farmer drive his tractor He had no arms why didn't he have arms Because he was a potato

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What's red and smells like cherries. Cherries

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how many licks does it take to get too the tootsie center of a tootsie pop. Well it depends on how you eat it, there is always the option of biting it, so there is no defined answer, as well as ones lick might absorb more of the lollipop then another mans.

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What's under there? I'm not falling for that one...

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what's hotter than my cousin's girlfriend? I don't know. she's remarkably hot. like, one of the hottest people I personally know.

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A man calls customer service. A man in India helps him with his problem.

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What happened when the Texan saw snow for the first time? He said "Oh my goodness this is cool"

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I may have alzheimers...Thank god I dont have alzheimers

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Jesus walks into a bar, the bartender shoot the zombie

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because I was on the other side. And I'm a chick magnet

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Two men walk into a bar. You think the second man would have seen it.

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Are you from Tennesse because my uncle grew up there and I was wondering if you knew him.

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Your momma so fat that she went to the doctor and he told he to cut down on the junk food because she weighs more than the average human being

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How many cows does it take to put in a lightbulb? Well, you see, it depends how many cows it takes to put in a lightbulb.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops