My cat used to be afraid of storms. But now it's dead.

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A man walked into a pub, and enjoys of a couple off pints. Some time later he loudly asks the gentleman next to him: Do you know about this thing called Fightclub?... The bartender had to call an ambulance, you don't talk about fightclub

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Roses are red Violets are blue Clever rhyming punch line refrigerator

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The chicken didn't cross the road. Therefor, there is no why.

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Friends are a lot like trees. If you hit them multiple times with an axe, they will fall down.

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5

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A man accidentally chops his thumb off while preparing his dinner for the night. He immediately calls an ambulance and has his thumb preserved which is later reattached back onto his hand. He then continues his dream career as a solo pianist.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was trying to commit suicide through vehicular manslaughter and knew that the average human being would not be able to stop before it was too late.

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why did the cow say "moo"? because he's a cow and that's what cows say.

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What's utter destruction but still has wheels? A car that was crushed at a junk yard, after the Bridgestone tires were removed for another car that could still use them

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How do you make a dog say meow? Freeze it and put it through a woodchipper. (MEROWRRRR)

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What's worse then a worm in your apple You took a bite outta that apple.

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A sheep walks into a baaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Why the long face?" The horse then precedes to beat the bartender voraciously for making fun of his religion.

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Q: A young friend you met on the internet invites you over to his house. When you arrive, Chris Hansen enters the room. What does he say? A: Welcome to our home

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Why did the car stop? It ran out of gas.

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What do you call a Muslim in control of a plane? A pilot

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Did you hear about the one about the man who walked into the library? He likes reading

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Q: What did Santa give the little boy for Christmas? A: Nothing, he's not real

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man boobs

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Your mom came to my house last night. We played chess.

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how many dead babies fit in a bathtub 16

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What's black & sits at the top of the staircase? A quadriplegic after a house fire.

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What did Niel Patrick Harris do after coming out of the closet? He grabbed his jacket and went for a delightful stroll in the park.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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