Friend's are like pinguins, they both die when you stab them in the heart.

2 guys walk into a bar the third one ducked

Hi my names Sarah and I love baby's. I don't think I could eat a whole one though

Q: Why did Susie fall off the swing? A: She had no arms Knock Knock Who's there? Not Susie.

roses are red viloits are blue Bernard is hot but then i led to you

So Colton Yepma walks in to Accounting and proceeds to read jokes

Why could'nt the boy eat peanuts? Because if he did he would proceed to have an allergic reaction, his throat would swell up, he would go into analeptic shock and die.

What's the difference between a vegetable and my son? Nothing

A fireman walks into a bar. Everyone has burned alive already, and he's too late to save them.

once there was an anti-joke. it wasn't well thought out or even very creative. what happened to the anti-joke's premise? it got undermined or reversed in the punchline. but the punchline was way too straightforward. so, the whole joke really ended up sucking.

You tie a noose around your neck, you jump off a cliff and before you hit the ground you shoot yourself in the head.

why did the chicken cross the road? it didnt it got hit by a bus.

OMG this actually works! 1. Hold your breath for 5 minutes 2. Die

An IRS agent named Harold Crick finds that he has the ability to hear a narrator comment on every moment of his life. He later becomes institutionalized in the Schizophrenic ward.

Whats worse than being arrested for a crime you didn't commit? Teenage pregnancy.

What the librarian say to the man? Hi, can I help you?

Who is big and stupid My brother

A man climbs a tree, falls, and breaks his legs. He will never walk again

Two gay men in a hottub. They relaxed for about half an hour before getting out and going to the bed, where they fell asleep.

I raped someone in my basement... ...Just Kidding!... ...I dont have a basement

Your mom is so old so will die soon.

What's the difference between a watermelon and a car? A lot.

The dog buried it's bone. The next day it unburied it, and chewed on it until it was wrecked.

Why did the monkey follow the tree? Because it was dead.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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