What do you call a muslim flying a plane? A pilot

What's the difference between a duck and male black prostitute? The duck is says quack

Why don't people say YOLO anymore? They all died in car crashes while texting and driving.

What did helen keller say when she saw a talking horse? nothing. because she didn't see the horse and they also cannot talk.

Was the worlds most expensive comedian any fun? Well, he was funny, but they where all cheap laughs. Moral: Expensive jokes are expensive.

What do call a someone with no arms, legs, and has an eye patch? Names

why do the klu kux klan wear pillowcases on their heads? they were going to go with coon skin but thought it was a little much!!

What did the wall say to the other wall? Nothing, cause they are walls.

Once upon a time, people died. It was happening all over the land. They didn't LIVE happily ever after... since they died. The end... for them.

Let's make like your mother and walk out on your family during pre-adolescence.

what did the African kid get for his birthday AIDS

a dyslexic man can't spell a word, don't judge him

What happened when the man went to the bar? He got drunk, drove home injuring a young teen mother, brutally assaulted his wife to the point of death. He's in prison serving 3 life sentences.

Q: What's worse than a pile of dead babies in a truck? A: A pile of dead babies in a truck with one alive in the middle eating his way out.

A bloke runs into the bank, says to the girl "Stick 'em up!" She says "Righty-o, matey" and sellotapes his bollocks to the ceiling.

Q. what happend to the guy who walked by an alley in new york? A. he got beat up by a robber wich took hes money, cellphone, keys and his abillity to walk.

What would happend if two nyan cats crashed into each other? It would be a great impact and we'd all be sad.

why was the boy crying he had cancer

whats green white black red and can fly? nothing.

How many licks does it take to get to center of a tootsie pop? pickles, 7:00 pm, wood, shoulder pain

I man walks into a bar. He orders a drink, takes around 13.5 minutes to drink it, then walks out. It takes him 10.7 minutes to walk home, 2.8 minutes less than he spent in the bar. When he is home, he decides to have a bath. 7.8 minutes into bathing, a radio plugged into an outlet near his tub falls into the water with him and he is killed. 29 miles away a woman sneezes twice.

Why'd the chicken cross the road? It was hit by an oncoming motorist in a busy intersection.

Q: What did the farmer say when he coudn't find his tractor? A: "where's my tractor?"

roses are red violets are blue i have a big dick unlike you

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...