How do you tie your shoes underwater? In a submarine

What do you get when you mix Catholicism and Islam? War

A dentist, a librarian, a construction worker, a gynecologist, a zookeeper, a shoemaker, a terrorist, a politician, a cyclist, a truck driver, a kangaroo, a Mexican, a blonde, a Jewish black guy, a Honda Civic, a monkey, a penguin, an FBI agent, a stock broker, a president of a foreign country, a CEO of a very wealthy company regarding AIDS, a founder of one of top downloaded apps in the market, a chief executive, a cook, a waitress, a priest, a nun, a little boy, a fairy, a dinosaur, and a skeleton walks into a bar. There's no punchline.

What did the white guy say to the black guy wearing a black T-shirt? That's a very nice shirt.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a shark in your apple.

Roses are blue, Violets are red, Wait, what? huh

1 I've been diagnosed with-- 2 I don't give a f*ck, go die in a hole!

what do you call 4 black people pushing a car uphill? unfortunate

Knock knock, Who's there? Banana Banana who? Banana Smith, I'm here for the Smith Family Reunion.

How many jews can you fit into a car? 2 in the front, 2 in the back, and a thousand in the ash tray.

your mommas so ugly it is affecting her self esteem!

I am back with more jokes! -Lets go Mets It is best to dislike this one

My dad died on Mothers Day, my mother was happy. Actually Iied, we were all sad.

What did the guy who speaks in tongue say to the other guy who speaks in tongue? Gibberish

What did the black guy say to the white guy? The black guy said, "hello". They then proceeded to have a normal conversation.

why did logan cross the road? to get raped by his father again

Dane Cook makes a joke.

Why did they use the phone as a football? Because it was a phone-ball.

How would a camel lick its own tongue It doesn't It actually gets karate chopped by Bob Sager.

what did the man say to his boss? Hello boss

Q: How do you confuse a blonde? A: Kill her entire family.

What did the chicken say to her chicks? One day I'll explain why we do this. For now, just follow me.

What did the pedofile say to the little girl? Nothing. She was properly supervised by her parents.

c======3

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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