how many dead babies can you fit into a blender? 17 how do you get them out? Tortilla chips, but you'd be arrested by that time anyway because you just murdered 17 babies

Hi? No!!!!!

Why did the chicken cross the road? Who cares

"Look me in the eye" said Cyclops.

Why did the man die? because he hit his head and drowned

theres no 'I' in 'team' but theres an 'I' in 'hitler'

why was the boy sad. his father is an alcoholic that beats him daily.

Why did the bugger cross the rode? He was tired of getting picked on

The French guy and the Italian guy got in the bar at the same time, but they didn't talk as they didn't know each other.

Why did the little girl not speak? It was Anne Frank

How do you stop a run-away bus? You sit down in the driver's seat and gently place your foot on the brake pedular and proceed to press it down. The brake pads, located in the calipers, will squeeze the brake discs and slow the bus eventually to stop at the crosswalk for the old lady accompanied by a young boy scout to cross the street and continue their wonderful lives.

Why did the girl go to the hospital? Her brother dared her to jump off the second story roof of their house...

A man gets hit by a car. His family is sad and plans a funeral.

Pull over dat ass to fat, no seriously your blocking a firelane

Why is the little boy crying on the side of the street? He fell and skinned his knee.

What goes up and down, up and down, up and down, forever? An insult to Newtonian physics.

Why is josh such a retard Because when he was born a brick fell on his head.

Why didn't the 13 year old boy have any friends? He was autistic and didn't connect properly with people.

Make little things count Teach midgets math

Two Atheists walk into a bar. A nearby Christian notices this fact and proceeds to slightly preach to both of the Atheists. They then kindly explain that they don't personally believe in God, but respect the Christian's opinion. They all order drinks, and become very close friends, engaging in a long, hateless conversation.

amy baked 35 sugar cookies and ate 25, what does she have now? diabetes.

How do you get a one armed clown out of a tree? Hit it in the face with an axe.

What is worse than using the toilet and then realising there's no toilet paper? A racially motivated massacre.

Roses are red violits are blue I have ADHD do you like cats?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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