- Anti Joke

Why did schlomo fall off the swing He lost balance because Muslims threatened to kill him

Your mom is so hot your daddy married her and they lived happily ever after

What's small, black and at the top of a burning building? Oh shit - I forgot my baby

A man walks into a bar. Later that night he comes home to an intervention and realizes he has a drinking has hurt him and his family.

In the land of cheerios, there are three social classes. The bottom class consists of the regular cheerios, the middle class consists of the honey nut cheerios, and the top class consists of the frosted cheerios. One day, Mr. Cheerio was disappointed with his life in the bottom social class. He thought to himself, "Gosh, I bet life would be much better if I were a honey nut cheerio!" So he goes to the mighty cheerio king and says "Oh great cheerio king, what must i do for thee that thou might make me a honey nut cheerio?" The great cheerio king then says to him "I shall make thee a honey nut cheerio if thou wilt go to all the neighboring lands and bring me back 100 different kinds of vegetables!". Mr. Cheerio accepts the quest and travels for many months and years through all of the neighboring lands and finally collects the vegetables. He returns to the cheerio king and he honors the bargain my making him a honey nut cheerio. Mr. Cheerio is very happy with his new life. Due to his higher rank in society, he is able to find a wonderful job, marry a wonderful woman and have a few wonderful kids. One day, Mr. Cheerio thinks to himself, "I wonder what my life would be like if my family and I were all frosted cheerios. I could provide more for my family, and we would have a much fancier way of life!". He returns to the cheerio king and says "Oh great cheerio king, what must I do for thee that thou might make my family and I frosted cheerios?". The king then states "I will make thee frosted cheerios if thou wilt go to all the neighboring lands and bring me back 100 different kinds of fruits." Mr. Cheerio accepts this new quest. He departs from his family and travels for many months and years through all the neighboring lands until he finds all the fruits he needs. He returns to the cheerio king and he honors the deal by making Mr. Cheerio's family frosted cheerios. The life of the frosted cheerios is incredible. It is everything that the Cheerio family could have ever wanted. There are new opportunities around every corner. One day, a friend of Mr. Cheerio invites him to a dinner party that all of the frosted cheerios will be attending. Mr. Cheerio and his wife are talking to their friends at the party, when Mrs. Cheerio says to Mr. Cheerio, "Hey, honey, I'm getting a little thirsty. Could you go get me some punch?". Mr. Cheerio finds a very long line and stands in it. Once he gets to the front, however, he discovers that it is the line for steak, not punch. He repeats this process with half a dozen other lines, but he cannot find the line for punch. He returns to his wife and says, "Honey, there's something wrong with this joke. There's no punch line."

Roses are red, violets are blue, Gee, I wish I could partake in even the first two lines of this stanza, but alas, I have colourblindness.

Roses are red Violets are blue I like to slap hookers

What did the boy with cancer get for christmas? -A haircut

Doorbell salesman.

What is dark in the darkness even if you shine a torchlight on it? A blackman

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? "Where's my tractor?"

Is that a banana in your pocket? As a matter of fact, yes it is.

What has two legs and is covered in red. Half a dog.

What do you call a black pilot? A pilot.

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Living in Africa.

why are black people so fast? because there black

Q:Whats the difference between NBC and the NBA? A: The NBA is the National Basketball Assocation and NBC is The No Body Cares.

When life gives you lemonade, give life lemons and it'll be like WTF?!

Q:what's worse than eating outdated raviolis? A:terminal cancer.

What's the difference between a black man and a bench? The bench isnt going anywhere.

A man and his wife are disagreeing about what type of car to get. The wife continously nags him about getting her something that will go from 0-200 in 4 seconds, so he gets her a scale and buys himself a truck, 1 min later an abulance is called because the wife hit the husband with his new car.

I donated to Kony 2012. Litterally to Kony. I approve of his actions.

"jrfevkhbgjk" said the retard.

Emily Brunelle is skinny

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

Want more? You might be interested in...

Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops