hashtags suck balls

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What's worse than death? Nothing.

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Why cant the white man dunk? Because he lost his legs in a horrible car accident

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What happened to the turtle that was on land Dead

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One kisses says: I have had 3 bottles of water today and I haven't peed yet. His friend says: O you probably have a urinary track infection.

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Whats the difference between a pizza and a Jew. The pizza doesn't scream in the fire

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-Knock, knock. -Is it the pizza man? -No. -Then go away.

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Why don't flowers bite you when you pick them? Cuz they don't have a brain.

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Q. What language cant you speak A.Sign language

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Why did the ground beef taste funny? Because little Timmy fell in the grinder.

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What did the mute guy say to the deaf guy?

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If you're American when you go into the bathroom , and you're American when you come out of the bathroom, what are you when you're in the bathroom. Ha, joke is on you because Americans don't pee.

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Why did the little boy fall off the swing? He had no arms.

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A blonde was told to go to the into the nearby swimming pool and sniff the Scratch-and-Sniff sticker on the bottom. Once at the bottom, she quickly realized that it was not a good idea and swam back to the surface.

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I once went to a chiropractor. She was so awful looking. You know those weird spiky fish with the lightbulb hanging off it's head? .....I saw one in a documentary once.

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Why did billy have a frog stapled to his face? Because he was having a bad day.

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Knock-Knock who's there? Artichoke Artichoke who? Your friend Artie choked on a ham sandwich, and I'm sorry to inform you that he didn't survive.

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What's the difference between the son of a prostitute and Luke Skywalker? Luke knew who his father was.

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What do you call Santa's helpers? Chinese factory workers, who live in impoverished conditions, work up to 16 hours a day, earning slave wages. God damn you, Steve Jobs and Mattel.

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knock knock whos there not me

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what happened to the man who got hit by a truck driven by Obama? he died.

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Wanna hear a joke? No? Oh

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What do you call a saxaphone playing unicorn, that's flying away to a distant planet on a penguin? a dream

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What did the chipmunk say to the nut? I'm gonna eat you.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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