Your mom is so fat because she eats too much and is most likely incapable of controlling when to stop.

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Q:What the difference between a piano and a guitar A: Nothing, there both instruments and i lied about the difference

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A man sits on the toilet to take a shit And is surprised to find the next door neighbours dog in the toilet.

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Don't you just hate it when a sentence doesn't end the way you octopus?

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a jam sandwich

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Why is The stop sign bent? Because a ambulance full of sick kids hit it.

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THis guy went into the bathroom with a girl in the middle of party and they started having sex but then the guy has to pee so he does... and then he leaves the bathroom and goes back to the party

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I'm on the ABC diet. The ABC stands for: Americans British Chinese I eat humans.

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Rather rich and healthy, then poor and sick.

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What has 3 eyes, green fur and blue ears? Nothing.

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did you hear the joke about the lobster and the clownfish? no.. oh.

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Q: Why is asprin white? A: It works.

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Blah blah something about Ryan Dunn.

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What do you call a donkey on Christmas? a donkey.

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Q. You are driving a car. In front of you there is a camion driving at your same speed. Behind you there is a helicopter flying at your same speed at the ground level. On your left there is an ambulance driving at your same speed and on your right there is a ravine. How do you get out from this horrible situation? A. Get off the carousel.

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Why did the leprechaun cross the road? If you still believe in leprechauns, you need to see a doctor.

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What do you call a Mexican that is jumping off a building? A suicidal jumper!

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If I was in a room with hitler Osama bin laden and Justin bieber and a gun with 2 bullets. I would shoot Justin bieber twice

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What's the difference between a baby and a pineapple? Pineapples were not shot by nazis during the holocaust.

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What do you call a girl who disappears on the 3 May 2007? Madeleine McCann

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No, Trinidad.

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How do you wake up lady gaga Set her alarm clock to an appropriate time

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Do you feel lucky punk, well do ya? ..Umm i'm sorry :/ I'm not gay!... I'm into chicks...you know?!

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How do you stop a baby from crawling circles? You nail it's other hand to the floor too

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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