knock knock who's there? the chicken i just crossed the road to offer you this token of appreciation for helping me screw in a lightbulb

thumb_up thumb_down -24

what did the man do when he was at the end of his rope? he bought more rope.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What's funnier than the pope in a speedo? Humor is subjective, so answers vary from person to person.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What's 2+2? Gonorrhea

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why did Hitler kill himself? Cause he couldn't afford to pay the gas bill.

thumb_up thumb_down -43

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I like saying the colors of flowers, Delphiniums are also blue.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

A man walks into a bar... who cares what happens after that Charlie Sheen is winning and Osama Bin Laden is dead

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Yo mamma's so fat, she's self-concsious about her weight and is embarassed when people make fun of her weight which makes her escape to her only friend, food, which makes her even fatter, so she will never lose weight until society accepts her and is not so prejudice towards overweight people.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

A bar walks into a man... The man begins screaming uncontrollably as the corner of the building is inserted into his anus. Brick by brick, the bar forces its way inside the man's ass, as blood begins dripping down his legs. The man knows damn well it is impossible for such a large building to be contained inside him, but he grits his teeth and forces his ass open wider. His ribs break, his lungs collapse, and his now lifeless body is stretched into the shape of the bar. The bar is almost entirely consumed before the man's skin gives way to the bulging pressure...with an explosion of blood & organs, the shredded remains of the man are slung-shot around the lot where the bar formerly stood. The bar, now soaked in a mixture of blood & organ fluid, reflects upon the failure of its experiment. For the next attempt, a man of far greater fortitude must be used, so that his body does not burst so easily. Only then will it achieve its dream of becoming the first bar to walk into a man.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Ben: do you want to hear a joke. jack: yh go on then, i bet its funny. Ben: Your future.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Two black guys walk into a bank They work there.

thumb_up thumb_down +38

what do you call Mackenzie Phillips? five head

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What's invisible and smells like carrots? Rabbit farts. What's invisible and smells like rabbit farts? Carrots, if you're blind.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Roses are red Violets are blue Columbine was funny

thumb_up thumb_down -27

What do you call a black man about to jump off a cliff? Suicidal

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Dora the explorer went on an adventure. sadly, all of the animals in the forest, including boots the monkey and swiper the fox, kill her as a sacrifice to an unknown God

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Obama being reelected.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What's the difference between the son of a prostitute and Luke Skywalker? Luke knew who his father was.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

ROSES ARE RED, VIOLETS ARE BLUE, WITHOUT MY HEART I CANNOT LOVE YOU

thumb_up thumb_down +6

How do you kill a down-syndrome kid? fire.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ

thumb_up thumb_down -23

How do you make a chicken fly? Throw it

thumb_up thumb_down +16

how do you beat up 3 year old with ease? you beat her up, 3 years can't fight for shit.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd probably put all the labials, coronals and dorsals in separate places sorted into plosives, nasals and fricatives, with the vowels at the beginning to make it more logical and easily attainable to foreigners.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops