There once was a man from Nantucket Who got his head stuck in a bucket He yanked and he yowled, he hollered and howled, Then gave up and grumbled, "Aw, I guess I'll have to go to the doctor."

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Whats black on top and white on bottom? R a p e.

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Person 1 - Did you know there is only evidents of killer whales killing in captivity Person 2 - tell that to my uncle Pete... He's deaf

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Roses are gray, Violets are gray, I'm colourblind.

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Did you hear about the new pirate movie? It was rated PG-13.

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Women's rights

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding out your Grandmother died.

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Somebody has robbed your house, how do you gather evidence? Look for traces of watermelon or chicken bones.

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When Life throws you lemons you might be hallucinating

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what do you call a little girl next to a mexican? a rape victim.

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greetings ZOE. WHAAA BANNANNAS ROCK MAH WORLD. WHY DID THE TRAIN CRASH? ....BECAUSE THE CONDUCTOR WAS A PIECE OF CHEESE! HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA. WELL LOVE YA CHICAS. PEACE AND BLESSINZ. SALUTATIONS, isabel.

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Roses are grey. Violets are grey. I'm a dog.

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How can you outsmart Stephen Hawking? Steal the wheels of his chair and replace them with a dolphin.

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A Muslim walks into a bomb shop. Unfortunately for the bomb shop owner, the Muslim was a police officer. He proceeded to arrest the owner and the employees of the store, as it turned out that the selling of these particular explosive devices were illegal. They ended up in jail, and justice was served.

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what's worse than the holocaust the man who thought of it

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What do you call a school bus full of white kids? A school bus.

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What's funnier than British people ? Their tea in the Harbor

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How do you kill a fox? With a gun. How do you kill a deer? With a gun.

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Yo mamma's so fat, she's self-concsious about her weight and is embarassed when people make fun of her weight which makes her escape to her only friend, food, which makes her even fatter, so she will never lose weight until society accepts her and is not so prejudice towards overweight people.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, You like penis, That's what you live up to.

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why did the duck swim upside-down -he was on quack

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How many pairs of underwear do I own? Seventy-nine.

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A blonde girl gets in a bad car accident . A man stops on the side of the road to help her . She is panicking The man gets out a piece of chalk and draw a small circle. He says "Do not step out of this circle" The man smashes her car with a baseball bat She giggles He rolls her car down the hill, She laughs Her car is on fire , She is cracking up He yells " WHAT IS SO FUNNY " She says , "I stepped out of the circle three times when you weren't looking"

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Why didn't the little boy wake up today? Because he's dead

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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