How do you get a black man off a swing? ask him.

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What did the explorer say to the new species Oh look it says squirtle let's call it squirtle Oh look it say woof let's call it poochyena

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The scientists of Cambridge have finally developed a cure for feeling low! They have presented it in the style of a song. See if you can spot the hidden frequency wavelengths when you sing it out lout. They are what make you feel better. You've got to LOVE the world! Be a friend! And when You're down you've got to get up again! And when your blue, here's what you do. Just sing this happy tune! However if that fails, then you should consider getting professional help.

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Q: Why did the purple cantalope eat the curtains at midnight? A: Sassafrass.

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Q: How do you eat a dead baby? A: One piece at a time.

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Two antennas falls in love. They get married. The wedding was horrible, but the reception was great.

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If Justin Bieber and Rebecca Black had a baby, would it be a boy or a girl? It's a fifty-fifty shot.

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What's the most famous anti-joke? This one.

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Wendy went for a walk every day in the forest. Why not today? She was shot yesterday

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Why did the man die when he saw the light? It was a strobe light and he died from an epileptic seizure

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What is the difference between a white mans penis and a black mans penis? It doesn't matter, phallic size isn't everything its what you do that defies you.

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Why did the hooker go to the bathroom? Because she just exchanged sex for money and was cleaning herself up for her next trick.

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A guy named Dick goes into a bar and the barman says: - "hey, show my your dick" - "show you my what?" asks Dick. - "your dick!" - "oh! no, I'm shy"

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how do you confuse a brunette? paint yourself red and throw a fridge at her

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Gay jokes arn't funny. "Come" on guys.

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How do you confuse a blond? Look at her

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What happened to the man that never got picked up? He died of a brain aneurysm, the ambulance never came.

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why was the frog sad..... because it was stappled to the boys face

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9:11 make a wish

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Q) What did the farmer say who'd lost his tractor? A) Where's my tractor?

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BIG PENIS

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Scott Gomez

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what is hollow and bloody? Vagina when it gets genital herpes

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A turtle walks into a bar. The bar tender says "what will it be?" the turtle doesnt reply because its a turtle and the bar tender is sent to a mental hospital for talking to turtles.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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