Two dogs are sitting by a fire hydrant. One turns to the other and says absolutely nothing because dogs can't speak.

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Tyrone is innocent! I can't wait until Kirsty gets hers!

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what did the orange say to the apple? hi

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Why does Santa Claus not have children? Because he only comes once a year.

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Tomorrow, today's yesterday.

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Roses are red Voilets are blue I have a gun Get in the Van

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Why was six afraid of seven? A: He just does.

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i wonder when lachlan will come out of the closet and give keiran a blowjob

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why did the doctor go to jail? he was found guilty of the murder and rape of a 6 year old boy.

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Oh look, I've found my knife

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. Who the hell named a blue flower "violet"?

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Stranger: Greetings. House-owner: No, you were supposed to say, "Knock, Knock". Stranger: Fine. Knock, knock... House-owner: Nobody's home. Stranger: These quirks are really getting on my nerve. Silly antics only serve to frustrate me. Oh, the irony!

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Why did the bird fall out of the sky? Someone shot it.

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Why did the rabbit cross the road? He was attempting vehicular suicide after being told yet again that he was "silly" and "Trix are for kids."

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Why did Harry Potter cast a spell on Chuck Norris' penis? Never mind.

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What can never be seen by the owner, looks like Jesses mom, and smeels like shit. Jesses dick.

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Why did the black man across the road? just kidding he didnt make it across the road i hit him with my car

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Whats long,hard, and has c.u.m in ig? Cucumber....also my wiener

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Why did women scream loudly!? As the women was unexpectadly frightend!

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Why did the boy hate his mom? She was a fucking bitch.

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A: What did the banana say to the other banana? B: I don't know, what? A: I don't know either, I was hoping you did.

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Want a fight? You Spelt F**K wrong O.o

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Why did Oliver fall? He shot himself.

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Arnold Schwarzenegger has a big one. Lady Gaga has a small one. Madonna doesn't have one. What is it? A last name.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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