Q: What's black and white and rape kids? A: Pandas, I lied about the rape.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Steve, what do I write on a 3946 if more than two vehicles were involved?

thumb_up thumb_down -15

what is green, blue with spots all over? A frog with chicken pox

thumb_up thumb_down +5

knock knock who's there? Police oh shit

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Did you hear the story about the divorcee who was concerned about ecology? Her husband had been hitting her. Good for her to get away from that kind of abuse.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

koj yog ib tug tsoob qaib eater, uas nyiam mus rau Peer li qub poj niam qhov chaw mos raws li ib tug nyiam ua! (Google Translate may help)

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What did Tom get for Christmas? Gloves, but Tom had no arms. Knock knock? Who's there? NOT TOM

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Yo mama is so fat, she needs to get serious about her diet, or else she might die of some sort of weight related issue.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What's worse than a pile of dead babies? Two piles of dead babies.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

It may be Stupid but its also Dumb. ~Patrick Star

thumb_up thumb_down -8

I walked in ony my daughter masturbating. The whole ordeal was very uncomfortable, but I sat her down at the dining table to discreetly explain the necessity of locking doors.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Q.What does chuck norris eat as breakfast? ans.FOOD

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Bill: Knock, Knock. Sean: Who's there? Bill: It's your neighbor, Bill Walters, from across the street. Sean: Oh, hey Bill, how are you and Margie? Bill: Oh, I'm doing fine, but Margie just got out of the hospital for a broken arm. Sean: My gosh, what happened. Bill: She was just loading the Halloween decorations down from the attic while I wasn't home and fell. She's fine though; it was only a minor fracture. Sean: Well thank goodness she alright. Bill: Anyway, I came over to return those hedge clippers I borrowed from you last month. Sean: Oh, thank you. How did they work? Bill: Just great once I gave them a coat of oil. It was a big job... I haven't trimmed those bushes in three years. Sean: Yeah, these clippers have belonged to my grandfather, father, and me. Bill: Darn, thats quite amazing, I wish I could get a pair of those, but I doubt they still make them. Sean: I'm pretty confident they don't, but you can borrow these anytime. Bill: Thanks Sean thats very generous of you. Sean: No problem, I almost never use them myself. Well I better get back to Jeanie...I'm helping her make dinner. Bill: Alright, Well thanks again.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Yo mama so dumb that she got mediocre grades throughout highschool and college which explains her less than desirable financial situation

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What did the japanese man say to the other Japanese man? I like your eyes.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Why was the Jewish holocaust bad? Because it's joke always end up on anti-jokes and millions of Jewish people where murdered in it.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Here's another:

thumb_up thumb_down +1

A Jew walks into a bar. He immediately turns around and walks out because prices at this particular high end bar are much too high for his liking.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Its true, he didnt write that!!

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Why did John kill Maris? Because Maris killed his family.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

A black guy and a mexican guy are in a car, Who's driving. A policeman.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Have you seen the movie "Gay Men Say No"? Oh yes, that is very insightful documentary on the modern day struggles of homosexuality.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

So a man walks into a bar and wonders why he walked into the building instead of simply just walking through the door. The man then realized that the building was if fact not a local bar, but instead a bowling alley. He was hallucinogenic and was in serious danger as he approached the candy man in the alley.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Knock knock Who's there? Joke Joke who? Auntie Joke Great, could you bake me those cookies I like.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops