Why did the plane crash? Chuck Norris was sitting in it, and thus his weight was countless times larger than the lift force of the plane.

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Q: Whats the difference between a watermelon and a infants head? A: One is fun to beat a with a hammer, and the other is the infants head.

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Committing Suicide #YOLO

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How many worms dose it take to eat an apple? One.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the sloth fall out of the tree? Because it was holding hands with the monkey. Why were the monkey and the sloth holding hands? Because they were best friends.

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The awkward moment when you notice its 2012 and we're all gonna die, so you buy and elephant and name him John.

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Q. How do you blindfold a Chinese man? A. With a blindfold.

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What did Frodo do when he realized that he needed to destroy the ring? He simply walked into Mordor

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Why couldn't the cat drink milk? It Didn't have a face.

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1)Did you hear about the sick juggler? 2)No... 1) He just couldn't stop throwing up!!!! 2)Oh no!! Is he ok?? 1)He's dead. 2)HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA c&h

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Why did the retarded man jump off a building to commit suicide? He didn't try to commit suicide. He was mentally retarted and didn't know any better.

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why did the boy buy a dirty magizine? he should not have, its been on the floor. who wants to read the rolling stone magizine if it has dirt on it. how dumb of him.

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What did the oncologist say to his patient? You have terminal cancer.

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A Jew walking in the street sees a homeless person asking for charity. He reaches to his pocket, grabs a penny, greets her with a nice smile and gives away the penny.

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How do you get a clown off of a swing? You throw an axe at its face.

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Why did you cross the road. You didn't your looking at this joke

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I like U.............................nicorns :D

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ring around the rosie ... your dead

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Is your refrigerator running? No.

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Agricultural production fell significantly.

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What did the retarded asian dolphin eat for breakfast? A big bowl of shit

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What did the big Chimney say to the little Chimney? Nothing they are chimneys ....

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A man walks into a bar and the barman says "Why the long face?" And the man replies "I am severely deformed".

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What did the gravel say to the road? Give me the D.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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