fallow me on twitter #ieatveloceraptorsfordinner

Why did the donkey fall over Because it had A diabetic foot infection and had to have a non traumatic amputation of the lower hind leg.

What's the difference between a black guy and a door? Various answers are acceptable. The door has hinges, a black guy has legs, etc.

How do two porcupines make love? Well actually it's doubtful that porcupines feel higher emotions like love - they pretty much just mate for reproductive purposes.

What do you call a gay woman who likes to smoke cigarettes? A lesbian with a possible nicotine addiction.

Why can't an elephant smoke cigarettes? They do not posses the fine motor skills.

why did the monkey fall out of a tree?? a snail threw a refridgerator at him

despite popular opinion to the contrary you shouldn't eat mercury.

whats 2+2? 4

What’s the best part about winning a gold medal? Nothing. You’re on acid and staring straight at the sun.

What do you get when you cross a road with a car? Severe injuries or even death.

A termite walks into the pub and says "Is the bar tender here?"

If someone throws a fridge at the boy then they must be exceptionally strong because fridges weigh more than the average human can lift therefor he has a good future ahead of him but will have to live with the fact that he hurt a small child

A man and a bird are on the edge of a cliff. The man falls off and dies and the bird flies away because birds can fly and people can't.

Why did the boy wear a winter jacket on the hottest day of the year? Because the boy was in antarctica and the hottest day was still below freezing.

A Frenchman stays and fights

B==========D-------------------------- im pissin man! god!

Whats brown and sticky? A peice of poo

well, I'm dying of AIDS, so....

Why don't you have a seat, over there?

how do you get a blonde to stop following you? file a restraining order.

Wanna hear a joke? My penis size.

What you reading? reading?

A drunken man grabbed a gun and shot his entire family to death. Luckily, a even drunker man had shot them moments before, so it really only served to ruin the perfectly good wall behind them with bullet holes.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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