Whats green all over and travels at 100mph A christmas tree in a gokart

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Q. What's the best thing to do before you get in a car accident? A. There's actually not much you can do in a car accident, considering you probably will never expect it, and it happens relatively too fast to react.

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Yo momma's so poor, that when she went to the soup kitchen, she got food.

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Q: There is an Elf King, King Kong, and Godzilla all on the empire state building. Which one jumps first? A: None, because none of them exist.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the farmer was arrested by the ASPCA and PETA for letting the chicken run free near a horribly busy road

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Take off your shoes.

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What did the blonde order in the restaurant? A cup of coffee.

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Why did the Jew have so much money? He had a good education and therefore, a high paying job.

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Amy Winehouse has been sober for 2 weeks now.

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What did the kid with no arms or legs get for Christmas? Cancer

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What did the English man say to the Japanese man? Nothing, they were incapable of conversation because of the language barrier created by the fact that neither had one another's language as a part of their curriculum.

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Knock Knock Who's there? I'm from the Department of Child Services, i'm here to take your children.

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Why do all gingers get mad all the time except having sex? Because they enjoy it!!!

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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What is worse than adolf hitler? Justin beiber

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what is so fun about having sex with twenty six year olds? There is a high possibility their breasts have developed, thus equaling more pleasure for you.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Tulips are pink Daisys are white

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Why did the black dude die? Because everyone must die at some point.

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Why did the heroin addict get staff infection? His skin broke open multiple times without proper cleansing.

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What's black and white and red all over? A panda with red paint splattered on it

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What do you call 10 Asians playing basketball? A group of friends hanging out and having a good time.

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A murderer walks into a bar with a knife. He then stabs seven people and is then arrested shortly after.

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Moderately entertaining story, friend.

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Where do you find a dog with no legs ? Same place you left it ...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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