A dog walks into a bar, followed by his blind owner.

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melons are berries, tomatoes are fruit, being a smart-ass isn't that good.

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What do you call a bunch of spics playing soccer? Professional soccer players.

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A black man is picking cotton in a southern white mans field. This is because the white man is paying a more than fair wage and the black man is a 3rd generation cotton picker who enjoys taking part in his heritage.

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Ham sandwich

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Three soldiers, one Japanese, one American, and one Italian were stuck in a desert. How did they escape? A rescue squad of thirty trained troops came down in a helicopter and brought them each to their respective homes except the Italian who was actually a M.afia boss so they put him in prison.

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A blonde girl walks into a car.

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What's black and white and red all over? A butler with a stab wound.

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Miley Cyrus.

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A woman should not be in the kitchen.

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Knock Knock! Who's there? The doorbell repair man.

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Person 1: Why can't a T-Rex clap? Person 2: BECAUSE THEIR ARMS ARE TOO SMALL! Person 1: No, because they are extinct dumbass

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How did the fireman get to the police station? He massacred his wife and children.

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What do you call 10 dead babies in a blender? A horrible, horrible child abuse incident.

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What do you get when you cross sodium citrate, citric acid, benzyl alcohol, monoethanolamine, sodium benzoate, gylcol disterate, FD&C Yellow #5, ammonium lauryl sulfate, methylisothiazolinone, fragrances/perfumes, FD&C Blue #1, sodium chloride, zinc pyrithione, methylchloroisothiazolinone, ammonium xylenesulfonate, ammonium laureth sulfate, cetyl alcohol, cocamide, guar hydropropyltrimonium chloride, 1-Decene, homopolymer, hydrogenated, trimethylolpropane tricaprylate and water? Head & Shoulders Dandruff Shampoo for Fine-Oily Hair

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roses are blue violets are green I am colorblind

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I flipped through the Yellow Pages, made a few calls, and found the Chinese man I was looking for.

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Why did the condom drive over his pet mac and cheese? Because his uncle was not george bush.

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A murder, a cheater, and a liar walk into a bar..... Woah the aptriots must be in town -Rocco Tufano

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Why is it okay to have four cats? Because I said so.

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what's the difference between eric bristow and colin baker? eric bristow is brilliant at darts.

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Benjamin Frankin was playing with his Xbox...

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Wanna here a joke? Womens rights

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Why did the fat chick have a camel toe? She was half camel

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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