Where do bananas come from? Mexico

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A blonde, brunette, and redhead live in the same neighborhood. They are Desperate Housewives

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mark is religion

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An automobile mechanic busted an engine fuse. A prostitute had oral sex with a Marine. An Inuit hunter detonated a sea mammal with TNT. What do they all have in common? They all blew a seal.

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Man: "Waiter, what's this fly doing in my soup?" The waiter shrugs and walks away. The restaurant is subsequently shut down because the man was a health inspector and also found evidence of rodents in the kitchen.

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Life gives you lemons you make lemonade. What do you do when life gives you melons... youre skrewed.

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"Everyone be very quite. Dont say a word or well get eaten by the big, fat stupid ugly fat faced dinosaur in that cave over there." "A word or well get eaten by the big fat stupid ugly fat faced dinosaur in that cave over there." "Look how clever Charles is now were all screwed."

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A elderly man was driving down the freeway when he got a call from his wife. He answered the phone and his wife said "Be careful dear, I just heard on the news that someone is driving the wrong way on the freeway." The wife then heard a loud crash over the phone as the drunk driver going the wrong way slammed head on into her husbands car, killing them both intstantly.

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Why did Stephen get an A on his test? He held his teacher at gunpoint and forced her to give him a good grade despite the fact he got an F.

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Knock Knock, Who's there? Nobody..

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whats white and big and white? alot of things...

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hi i'm a dick, i mean mitt romney

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Why was six afraid of seven? Fishsticks

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why can't helen keller drive? Because she is deaf and blind.

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What's worse then getting a broken bone? A large marsupial charging at you with vicious speed

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If you are my friend like it!

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A man runs over a woman...... Who's fault is it? The man's. He shouldn't be driving in the kitchen.

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What did the man say when he put his penis in the blender? Arghhhhhhh!

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Knock Knock Who's there? Me ill kill u,

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what's worse than the Holocaust. Finding two worms in your apple.

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Why was the elderly, Asian, blond pulled over by the officer? She was, and has been completely blind since birth.

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Why did the lion eat food Because seaweed is green

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What do you call a kid with no arms, no legs, and an eyepatch? Names.

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Q: What's big, green, fuzzy, and will kill you if it falls out of a tree? A: A pool table.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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