Bob dole

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Wheres my tractor?

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why does girls have two left feet and two left hands? Because girls have no rights.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What do you call white trash Garbage

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Why didnt the teenager have a smartphone? He didnt live close to a cell phone store

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Sex education in Texas.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

If the blue man lives in the blue house, the red man lives in the red house and the green man lives in the green house, where does the orange man live? In the orange house.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What's worse then biting into your apple and finding a worm? Biting into your apple and finding two worms.

thumb_up thumb_down

how much dub would a dubstep step if a dubstep could step dub? purple

thumb_up thumb_down +35

Did you hear about the guy who fell out of the stands at the ranger game? He died.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

How does camon Die? He kills himself because he didnt make it into the marine corps

thumb_up thumb_down -20

how long is a peice of string howeverlong you want to make it

thumb_up thumb_down +21

what did jake say to the priest? hmmm, salty

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Wanna hear a joke? The WNBA

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Did you hear what happened when the President, the Pope and the Dalai Lama went golfing? Neither did I.

thumb_up thumb_down -103

A Muslim walked into a bar. He didn't drink anything

thumb_up thumb_down -47

A duck walk into a bar and asks the bartender for a drink. The bartender hands him a glass and the duck drinks it. After finishing his drink he ruminates about how drowning his misery with booze won't solve a thing in his life. He decided he'll call his ex-wife and apologize and goes back home.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Bill: Knock, Knock. Sean: Who's there? Bill: It's your neighbor, Bill Walters, from across the street. Sean: Oh, hey Bill, how are you and Margie? Bill: Oh, I'm doing fine, but Margie just got out of the hospital for a broken arm. Sean: My gosh, what happened. Bill: She was just loading the Halloween decorations down from the attic while I wasn't home and fell. She's fine though; it was only a minor fracture. Sean: Well thank goodness she alright. Bill: Anyway, I came over to return those hedge clippers I borrowed from you last month. Sean: Oh, thank you. How did they work? Bill: Just great once I gave them a coat of oil. It was a big job... I haven't trimmed those bushes in three years. Sean: Yeah, these clippers have belonged to my grandfather, father, and me. Bill: Darn, thats quite amazing, I wish I could get a pair of those, but I doubt they still make them. Sean: I'm pretty confident they don't, but you can borrow these anytime. Bill: Thanks Sean thats very generous of you. Sean: No problem, I almost never use them myself. Well I better get back to Jeanie...I'm helping her make dinner. Bill: Alright, Well thanks again.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

How do you get someone to come out of the closet? Unlock it

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Chuck Norris was the leading role in the television show Walker, Texas Ranger.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

What did the girl without arms get for her birthday? A pair of gloves.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

what do a dog and tree have in common? nobody cares when they die

thumb_up thumb_down +38

why was the little boy brutally murdered? there was a serial killer in his town.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Why did Amy fall out of the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock. (Who's there?) Not Amy.

thumb_up thumb_down -41

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops