1 + 1 = ? 2 "No" "what have you been smoking?" "Seriously, 1+1= window" "WTF???"

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Why was the boy crying? Because him and his sister were sent to an orphanage.

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What have in common a recently born baby and a quadriplegic blonde person? Both have legs but they cant walk

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A scottish man having fun

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Why did lil' Jimmy fall off his bike? The weight ratio between the left and right sections of his body became uneven due to some sort of change in the traction of the tires to the bumps on the road/ path.

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What starts with "F" and ends in "uck" Firetruck.

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Why can't Ray Charles read? Because he's dead

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why barack obama sad he realized the 4 trillion dollars of debt wasn't going be solved by borrowing more money

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knock knock who's there? the police you are wanted for 5 counts of 1st degree murder.

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*Knock Knock* Who's there? It's Jeff. Hi there Jeff, come in, the doors open.

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Q. Why did Jimmy fall off his bike? A. Because he had alzheimer's and couldn't remember how to ride a bike.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she was born with the disorders of being blind and deaf. For any human, having blindness and deafness makes driving a near impossible task.

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How did the black man start his car? He turned on the emission and lightly leaned his foot on either the accelerator or reverse pedal, depending on the position of the car.

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Haikus are easy, But sometimes they don't make sense. Refrigerator.

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How did little Jimmy survive the 20 story fall? He couldn't he died from the last fall, aren't you paying attention?

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A man walks into the bar and the bartender asked, "Why the long face?" The man replies, "Oh, sorry." And proceeds to remove his horse mask.

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Daddy look! Roses! No son, those are rhododendrons... Daddy how do you spell rhododendrons? Uh... never mind son those are roses. So... Daddy how do you spell roses? Son, never mind that is a dog. So daddy how do you spell... SHUT UP! Moral: I put a spell on you.

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Knock knock Who's there? I don't know go check.

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A duck walks into a bar, and the bartender says "what'll it be?" The bartender is then sent to a medical clinic after letting several wild animals into his bar and proceeding to feed them alcoholic drinks. He is diagnosed with schizophrenia.

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kids make accidents in the backseat of your car but u and your wife made an accident in the backseat and thats how you got that rottten troll that makes accidents in the car!!

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A zebra walks into bar, the surrounding customers in the bar become very intrigued why this exotic creature has wandered from Africa into New york. Before they can come to a concluson animal control opens fire on the creature, splatering its organs onto the tables. This event ruined the night for most customers and they fileout of the bar calmly but sad

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What did the orphan kids get for Christmas? Cancer.

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A man has aids. He has plenty of sexual partners and they all contract the disease.

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Q how do you feel? A with a series of nerve endings, that send signals to my brain

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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