What do you call a horse with a missing leg Calling it names could be considered animal abuse and should be reported immediately

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

A blonde walks into a store and tells the clerk "I'd like to buy that microwave". The clerk says "we don't sell things to blondes.". The blonde comes in the shop the next day with a brown wig on and says "I'd like to buy that microwave". The clerk says "we don't sell things to blondes". The blonde asks how he knew she was a blonde. The clerk replies, "I can see flyaway strands of your hair from the top of your wig and the synthetic hair material of the wig is not convincing.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

what is the color of a burp burple

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Knock Knock Who's there? The police. The police who? Your wife has been killed in a car accident.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why didn't the little boy hear the ice cream truck? He was deaf.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

why hppened when the little boy failed his math test? He cut off his penis, shaved his head and hung himself

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What is holocaust victim's favorite food? Hamburgers.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

how do you stop a black man from drowning take your foot off his head

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? i don't know, he hasn't unwrapped it yet

thumb_up thumb_down -2

How do you kill a blond? Put a scratch and sniff card at the bottom of a pool.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

A man is on his way home from a business trip and walks into his house. He is quite as to not wake up his wife or kids. He gets to the bedroom to find his wife in bed with the neighbor. He is shocked at what he came home to and decides to file for divorce. She was a stay at home mom and loses everything because of the divorce. The man woke up from his horrible nightmare and kissed his wife on the cheek. She has always been faithful. He decides to tell her about the dream and, for insurance, emphasizes the part where she loses everything in the divorce. They happily live out the rest of their lives together.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 recently got out of prison for violent rape.

thumb_up thumb_down -37

why is the man laughing. he isn't, he's just been informed he has testicular cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What happened when Chuck Norris jumped into the pool? He then got water on him, and later had to dry off.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What happened to the boy who crossed the road without looking both ways? He was abducted by aliens.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What did the black man do when his Polish friend died of cancer? He fertilized his front lawn as it was beginning to burn due to overexposure of the sun.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What is the secret to losing weight? Limb Amputation.

thumb_up thumb_down +42

What blew the baby's mind? Daddy's knuckles.

thumb_up thumb_down

b

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Why are black people afraid of white people? Over two hundred years of oppression.

thumb_up thumb_down +153

What did the bus say to the short bus? Heh, you're retarded..

thumb_up thumb_down -28

A white man walks into a bar. He orders an alcoholic beverage, and thinks to himself, " that made me feel a lot better. He drives home in his Cadillac and takes a nice sleep until 7am, when he is supposed to work. He is an architect.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Why did the fat kid fall of his bike? The skinny kid pushed him off!

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops