What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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A black man is like a sledge hammer; if you compare him to a sledge hammer, he will hit you with a sledge hammer.

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A: Ask me if im a fire hydrant. B: Are you a fire hydrant? A: No...

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Why couldn't the man reach the police on his phone after his leg was hacked off by a serial killer? He had AT&T as a service provider.

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Why did Suzie fall off the swing? She had no arms or legs. Knock Knock Who's there? Not Suzie.

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Roses are yellow, violets are grey, I'm colorblind

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Your Mom was so fat he made herself Liposuction Twice

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Whats worse than being a black guy? NOTHING.

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Dad they tell me I am homosexual at school, what does it mean? Ask your boyfriend.

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(Knock, knock) A: Who's there? B: Orange A: That is impossible. Oranges are inanimate objects and, therefore, cannot speak.

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-Have you seen Stevie Wonders new house? -No. -Well niether has he.

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How did the man with no arms or legs cross the street? He didn't.

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Think of a number 1-10 Now add 39 Divide that by 20 Subtract two Now close your eyes.. Dark isn't it?

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Where's my baby??

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How do you give a cold sore to catnip? Because he needed lemon juice

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Have you ever had Ugandan food? Neither have they.

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I have no soul so I must consume yours

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Me: What as 9595 legs,3500 eyes and 9894 teeth? You: I dont know... Me: Me neither,but its on your leg.

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Why is there no Asprin in the rainforest? Because it's financially viable to sell pharmesuticals in the vast, unpopulated rainforest.

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Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Shes been dead for some time now.

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Q: Why did the turtle cross the road? A: Doesn't matter, got hit by car.

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In Soviet Russia a lot of people were killed for voicing their opinion against Stalin

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How did the man lose his arm? beacuse of the five year old with a knife obsesion standing right beind you at this minute...

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A twelve year old play Minecraft. He never made any friends. What did you expect?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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