A seal walks into a club. The man proceeds to skin it and sell the fur for profit.

Hi

What is the best thing in the world? The opposite of the worst thing in the world.

No it doesnt..

alex and clayton are having sex at school. at that point, their teacher walks in and tells clayton about the dangers of unprotected sex.

There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge asked "Mum, why is my name Fridge?" to which she replied "Because you deserve to be in one."

-What's the difference between Michael Phelps and Hitler? Michael Phelps can finish a race.

What happens when you stick your hand down the jelly bean jar? The black one steals your watch.

What's white and sticky? Glue

whats hard, its not what you think a penis

What is yellow outside, black inside, and makes you laugh when it falls? A school bus full of black people falling from a clif

Safety in numbers? Try telling that too six million Jews.

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 raped 9.

how do you get a baby to stop swinging from a fan whack it with a shovel

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was being chased by a wolf, who promptly ate the chicken when they arrived at the other side.

Why was the black man eating a banana? Because bananas are an excellent source of potassium.

why is the asian still in the driveway? her car broke down

What did santa say to the little girl on Christmas Eve? Santa isn't real, but pedophiles are.

why did the woman cross the road? to get groceries for making more sandwiches.

Why did the blond woman throw a clock out the window? She was going through a bitter divorce, and didn't want her ex-husband's things in her house anymore.

What did the tree say to the other tree?....nothing cause trees can't talk!

knock knock who's there? Madeline McCann really? no

What did the Wife say to her husband about his Erectile Dysfunction? - Im sorry I dont know how to finish a joke based on this private a matter.

?"what's up" "A preposition"

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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MOAR??

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