A man walks into a bar with a giant banana as a head and the bartender asks why he has a giant banana as a head and the man says get me a drink and i will explain, the bartender got the man a drink and he started to explain why, so i found this real nice golden lamp and i rubbed it next thing you know this genie pops out and he said i get three wishes the first one he wishes for unlimited wealth with a snap of the genies fingers the wish came true next he wished to be the most handsome man ever with a spin and a snap the wish came true but this is where it went wrong, I said to the genie and i cant believe he got me with this one (because genies always put a twist on things) i said: i wish for my head to be a banana

Farmer Ned chased his chickens before they laid their eggs, because he likes his eggs scrambled.

What is a boomerang that doesn't come back? A stick.

Yo mama is so stupid that she is currently taking courses in a community college to get her degree in business so she can have a well-paying job.

What makes George Michael gay? The fact he engages in sexual intercourse with other men.

What's the difference between a dead Blackman in the road and a dead dog in the road? There's skid marks in front of the dog.

What did the black man say to his wife? Nothing, she had died earlier that year after a long battle with cancer.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

Three guys walk into a bar.....The fourth one ducks...

Knock Knock! Who's There? Billy Sup Billy, come on in!

Blonde hair is the result of having two recessive alleles for hair color in your genotype. There is no correlation between hair color and intelligence.

What's white and can't climb a tree? A refrigerator.

What happens to an elephant when it rains? It gets wet.

There were two muffins in an oven. They were forgotten about by the baker so they cried, caught fire, burned to death, and formed a medium-sized pile of ashes.

"What time is it?" "Time to buy a watch." The homeless man inquiring about the time proceeded to cry.

Why is Kim Jong Un so horrible? I forgot the rest of the joke but your mum is a whore

What was the last thing the boy heard before he was hit by the school bus? Nothing. He was deaf.

Why did apple fall off the tree? Because Sally was holding on for dear life and she grab the apple. The apple was still in good condition; Sally however, not so good.

How do you make a blond cry? Rape her and kill her family.

Why was little timmy crying? He walk in on his dad molesting a minor.

What did timothy say after he went to go golf? - I just went golfing

Why did the little boy drop his Ice cream? He had no arms(:

a little girl is playing outside of her house when i man in a van approaches her and stops to ask if the girl will help him find his puppy and that he has some gandy. seeing as the girl has a great love for animals she gets in the van. the man and the little girl drive around until they find the puppy. the man is so overjoyed her rewards the girl with candy. he then drives her back to her house and she feels wonderful having helped the man find his puppy. the end.

There was a bunch of kids on a bus. One boy yelled "Look a squirrel!" Nobody saw it because he's dyslexic

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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