What do you call a gay woman who likes to smoke cigarettes? A lesbian with a possible nicotine addiction.

thumb_up thumb_down +41

What's five miles long and has an IQ of 40? A democrat parade.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What is the best joke ever? 1D

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have amnesia! Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have amnesia! Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have amnesia! Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have amnesia......

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What cheese is not yours? The one that you didn't buy.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Q: what is blue and floats in a pool? A: a baby Q: what is purple and at the bottom of the pool? A: the baby 5 minutes later

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Why did the chicken cross the road ? To get to the other side Why did the lollipop cross the road ? It was stuck to the chicken's head Why did the chicken commit suicide ? He couldn't get the lollipop off its head

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Why did the other reindeer make fun of Rudolph? He had one nut

thumb_up thumb_down -22

What did the tree say to himself? Gee-oma-tree( get it geometry say it outloud)

thumb_up thumb_down

What do black people and tornadoes have in common? - It only takes one to destroy a neighborhood.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What is the french word for penis? I cannot say because I do not possess an adequate knowledge of the language.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

A man walks into a bar, he begins drinking and returns home visably drunk. His family disowns him as he is a recovering alchoholic who was three months sober.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Whats the difference between a black guy and a pizza? A black guy is a human being, and a pizza is a food you racist.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Why was i said when 4 black people in a cadillac fell over a cliff. The car blew up...

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was a registered sex offender who recently got out of federal prison after a 20 year sentence.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What happened when the man crossed the road? He lived happily ever after because he looked both ways for traffic.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Feet

thumb_up thumb_down -83

Your blood is red. Your bruises are blue. I have a gun. Now drag your carcass away from my residence.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Doctor, doctor! I think I've got an ear infection. I best give you some medicine.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

The original Superman: Cruelty! Do you remember the original superman color movies? Like when he just deflected lasers bombs fire and bullets, he threw busses, spun around the world, was completely immune to anything but kryptonite and then... (pls dont hate) ...Fell of a horse and became a complete cripple?

thumb_up thumb_down -78

Why do rabbits have such a reputation for rampant reproduction? Sex feels extra good for rabbits.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Why did Suzie fall off the swing? Not because she had no arms, but because she just had no hands.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

A man goes into a store to buy some bread, He asks a woman behind the counter for help. She says " We have white, wheat, or rye. What kind would you like?" . To which the man replies, " It does not matter, I rode my bicycle.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

what do you call a baby with no arms and no legs in a mailbox? a horriffic murder

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops